Down a Guinness, take a punt and have a shout: Cheltenham is back in all its glory

The Cheltenham Festival in the UK is back this week, with grandstands packed with 65,000 people a day for four days. After 2021’s echoingly empty racecourse and 2020’s Covid-jittery affair, expectations are for an epic like in the good old days.

Cheltenham is described in polite circles as the ultimate test of thoroughbred jump racing (The Greatest Show on Turf, ho ho). It is the “championships” of what Brits call national hunt – hurdle and steeplechase racing.

But among racing’s great unwashed it’s the ultimate test of wallets and livers.

I had a bookmaker pal who used to go to Cheltenham in March each year to take on the punters – and come home flushed with excitement and cash. He made enough money at that one race meeting to “retire” for the rest of the year.

Though the action at Prestbury Park in the Chiltern Hills of England barely registers in the South Africa media, it’s massive sporting occasion in Britain – up there with Wimbledon and the Open Championship. We hear about the famous Grand National steeplechase at Aintree, but Cheltenham is as big – not to mention more of a rowdy, wired, exciting bit of lunacy.

More than 250,000 people pass through the turnstiles and wager hundreds of millions of pounds (that would be billions of rands!) on the outcome of 26 races. This one event accounts for 10% of the British Tote’s annual on-course betting turnover at more than 1,000 meetings. It’s the biggest punting party on earth.

The whole shebang is helped along by a phenomenon known as The Irish. Up to half of the participants travel from across the Irish Sea with a belligerent glint in the eye, a big thirst and sights on 250 on-course bookies.

St Patrick’s Day, 17 March, falls during the week. Can you imagine?

Drink is involved. Consumption of 20,000 bottles of champagne, 30,000 of wine, 240,000 beers and 220,000 pints of Guinness have been recorded by someone. Singing and fighting have been known.

For the Micks, jumps racing is religion and Cheltenham a shrine. The devotion doesn’t go unrewarded: Irish horses, jockeys and trainers often dominate and last year cleaned up to the extent that it was dubbed a “greenwash”. Similar is predicted this week.

The leading trainers in recent years have been Irishmen Willie Mullins and Gordon Elliott. The Irish Mirror has suggested accumulator bets – a 488-1 wager on some of Elliott’s longer shots, Floueur (Tuesday), Tiger Roll (Wednesday), Frontal Assault (Thursday) and Ginto (Friday); and a 100-1 flutter on Mullins’s well-backed Sir Gerhard (Tuesday), Gaelic Warrior (Tuesday), Facile Vega (Wednesday), Allaho (Thursday) and Vauban (Friday).

Accumulators (or all-to-come bets) on top jockey Rachel Blackmore’s rides over the week are so popular bookies are reported to be getting very edgy.

It all culminates in the Cheltenham Gold Cup, the blue riband of world jumps racing. Legends are born here – Arkle, Desert Orchid, Best Mate etc.

Cheltenham is live on the Gallop TV streaming service, from 3.30pm to 7.30pm each day – and perhaps on DStv’s Racing240 – and there are plentiful betting options on Saftote and bookmaking websites.

Ruby Walsh, the most successful jockey in Cheltenham history, gave his Tuesday selections to the Sporting Post website:

Sky Bet Supreme Novices Hurdle – JONBON

Sporting Life Arkle – SAINT SAM

Ultima Handicap Chase – BEN DUNDEE

Champions Hurdle – HONEYSUCKLE

Brown Advisory Mares Hurdle – STORMY IRELAND

Boodles Fred Winter Juvenile Handicap Hurdle – BRITZKA/EBASARI

Ukraine Appeal National Hunt Chase – VANILLIER

DAY ONE NAP – Stormy Ireland