I chose life, I chose my kids

Three years ago, my life was looking great – from the outside. I was married with two kids (a pigeon pair), two dogs (also a pigeon pair), had a comfortable house and a job. But in the background things were brewing, inside our marriage, we were facing some demons and things got to the point where my marriage, and my whole life, fell apart. In one swoop it seemed like there was no reason to live anymore.

In November 2016, I moved out (for the second time) into an Airbnb house that I shared with several other individuals. I was only able to see my kids every second weekend and we would all share my small room – life was looking bleak. To make things worst I had to go under debt review just to try and survive financially.

Taking the last bit of money, I had, my kids and I went on holiday in December 2016 and visited my mom and sister in Polokwane. Although we enjoyed the holiday the new year was looming over me like a huge shadow, I knew as soon as we got home life and reality would come crashing back in.

I decided I need to get my life back on track – for me and for my kids.

So, I started to write down a list of goals that I wanted to achieve. They were generic at first; get my own place again, see my kids more often, become financially free, eat healthier and run a marathon were some of the goals amongst the list. After completing the list, I stuck it on the inside of my cupboard door and made it a habit to look at the goals daily.

I knew that for me to become a better dad, I needed to first become a better human being. I had no idea at that stage how I was going to do that, but I was willing to do anything and everything to achieve this ultimate goal.

One of my goals, to run a marathon, was selected for one specific reason, at that stage I was under the impression that it is the cheapest sport to get involved in, you only needed a pair of running shoes and the open road, little did I know that this specific goal was going to change my life, for the better, forever.

I knew I had to commit to a race so that I had a goal to work towards, so I entered the first marathon I could find 16 weeks from that day. You might ask why 16 weeks from then? I haven’t run in the last 13 years and I needed time to get fit and most training programs said it takes 16 weeks to prepare for a marathon.

I started to take one day at a time, woke up earlier each day and ran a little bit further every day. I also changed other habits like stopped watching TV and started to read books, watched motivational YouTube video clips, listened to audiobooks on becoming a better you through the experience and guidance of individuals who seemed to have mastered it.

I also started to eat a lot more healthily and surrounded myself with individuals that would motivate me to become a better version of myself. I lived by the motto: That you are the average of the 5 people you surround yourself with the most often. By using this principle I made sure that the people in my life helped me to improve my average.

Kilometre by kilometre, day by day, I could feel how I was putting myself back together again piece by piece. Each new routine became a habit and before I knew it the habits became a lifestyle. My work started to excel, and I was knocking out Salesman of The Month awards almost every month and I ended up winning the Salesman of The Year award and the chairman’s award that year. My relationship with my kids improved by making sure that the little time we did have together that it was meaningful and precious.

By July 2017, I was ready to put toe to the starting line of my first ever 42.4km Marathon which was in Knysna. The training the 16 weeks prior was in no way an indication of just how tough an experience lay ahead of me, but after 4 hours and 28 minutes I crossed the finish line with sore legs, a tired body and no power left but I had never felt stronger. I was engulfed by a wave of endorphins, serotonin and oxytocin as I received my medal and was congratulated by friends and complete strangers.

In the time it took me to run a marathon, four and a half hours, something in me had changed, I was different, I was seeing life anew. I knew my world would never be the same again.

What was initially a once-off bucket list goal of completing a marathon, soon developed into a new way of life for me.

My goals have since become a lot more ambitions. And as I write this, I just realized all over again how I have transformed my life in the last three years into something more than anything I could have imagined.

Since making the decision in 2016 to live life, my life is firmly back on track. I have my own place again, my kids stay with me 50% of the time, financially I am in a much better space, I have put over 5000km on my running shoes, I have successfully completed 2x Comrades Marathons, 2x Two Oceans Ultra Marathons, 6x Full Marathons, 1x 94.7km Cycle Challenge and 1x 50km Three Peaks Ultra Trail Race.

In February 2019, I started a podcast channel called GerhardLiveLife, where I share my life story to help motivate and inspire other individuals to become a better version of themselves than what they were yesterday.

I have also met the love of my life who is a beautiful woman inside and out and we have joined forces with my podcast show and it is now called GerhardandChristineLiveLife. It has grown beyond our expectations and numerous small to medium companies have started to partner with us where we share our experiences with their products and/or services on the show and how it may help individuals to become a better version of themselves.

Wanting to give back, even more, we have embarked upon starting an NPO where we get experienced runners to donate their old running shoes to us and we find underprivileged communities and provide them with the shoes. It is called ForTheLongRun and the idea is to start a movement where we can help these individuals to become a better version of themselves through running, similar to how it changed my life.

Like my feet, my goals have not slowed down. I have my sights set on my first triathlon in October of this year, this is the dress rehearsal for my first full Ironman in April 2020. Running saved my life and opened a whole new world to me that I could only imagine. I’m hoping my story inspires other people out there that are looking for a purpose in their life.

But even almost, more importantly, running save my relationship with my children. And ultimately made me a far better dad.

Find your passion, look for a purpose, but always remember to live life!

“I’m a 35-year-old Father of two beautiful kids.  My passions in life are helping others, this originated from my own journey of becoming a better human being after going through a tough divorce 3 years ago amongst other challenges.  I have since then decided to live life to the fullest and used running as a mechanism to widen my view on life and focus on growing myself on a daily basis through some basic life principles and highly effective habits.  I share these experiences with other individuals through my Podcast channel called GerhardandChristineLiveLife.  My goal is to be an example to my kids on how you can make a difference in other people’s lives!”

If you are keen for more inspiration or motivation, follow me on Facebook, Instagram, Strava or check out my Podcasts and website.

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