Will we find our lives, and where we lived them, where we left them?

You know how when they make a movie or a play, there’s always a bar or a restaurant, where all the action happens? I was always quite sceptical about that. There’s no chance, I would tell myself, that so many things would all go down at the same establishment.

We spend our time at and in so many different social spaces, and the pivotal events of our lives can happen in any of them. But then I looked at my life, as one tends to do in these contemplative times, and I realised … I realised that a bunch of the most pivotal events of my life have all gone down in the same bar.

The Foundry, in Parktown North.

Look at your life, and consider, you may have a Foundry of your own, somewhere in Johannesburg. Maybe the Thunder Gun in Cresta. The Jolly Roger in Parkhurst? Perhaps Rockets in Bryanston, who knows.

I don’t even live near the Foundry! But sure enough, when matters in my life come to a head, and I find myself in a particular psychological space, sure enough, I find myself going to the Foundry.

If you’ve been to the Foundry, you’ll know it has a spacious, stylishly appointed dining hall, and a more intimate bar area, with a tasty and varied menu. The staff are attentive and professional, including George, the barman, and there is a balcony beloved of our nation’s beleaguered smokers.

It has provided the perfect venue for a series of meetings that defined my life.

I took my former wife there on a date, when we were trying to patch things up. I used to go there after practice with my band. I met a group of friends there, once a month to socialise, when I was re-establishing my single life.

My next partner, where did we go on our earliest dates? Oh, that’s right, the Foundry in Parktown North. When that relationship ran its course, and I started dating again, where did I turn to when put on the spot for a venue?

Actually, a pattern is emerging, and I needn’t incriminate myself too much.

There may be such a place in your mind, and in your life too. A place with just the right atmosphere for you to feel safe. Where you can express yourself authentically. A place where you can be you.

The tragedy is that as I sit here typing, I have no idea whether the Foundry still exists. That welcoming bar and eatery on the corner of Third and Seventh, is it still a place? When we emerge like hobbits from our holes at the end of this lockdown, will I still be able to go to the Foundry and be myself?

Will George still be there behind the bar? Will I still be the last playboy of the northern suburbs in his eyes? Maybe I am the last playboy in the northern suburbs, who am I trying to kid.

For all my faults, this place, about 10 kays from my house, is where I have felt most myself. Much of our identity is place. Where we live, where we work, the spaces we visit, and where we feel comfortable.

One can’t help wondering how our spaces will have changed, after this. Which of them will still exist, and which not.

I think after our long months of introspection, when we emerge, we are likely to find that all this time with ourselves has changed us. But also, we may find that the places and spaces that also define us, those have changed irrevocably too.

When we head out to restart our lives, we may find that our lives are no longer where we left them. It may take a while to find them again.

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