The worst types of landlords every renter dreads

Renting a place to live is supposed to be a simple transaction: you give your landlord money and, in return, you get a roof over your head, four walls and, ideally, a functioning toilet.

Seems straightforward, right? Well, not if you’ve had the misfortune of crossing paths with one of the many crazy landlords out there.

Some landlords believe they’re not just renting you a place, but are also adopting you. This is the type of landlord who shows up unannounced – constantly. They’ll tell you how to live your life, too.

On the flip side is the phantom landlord, who disappears into the ether the moment you sign the lease. Need a lightbulb replaced? A sink fixed? A door that actually locks?

Good luck getting in touch. You’ll send a 100 texts, leave voice messages and probably train carrier pigeons just to get a response.

Then there’s the landlord who fancies themselves as a handyman. They won’t hire professionals to do repairs because, obviously, they’re perfectly capable of doing it, despite all evidence to the contrary. The leaky tap? Fixed with duct tape.

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Some landlords avoid confrontation like the plague, which sounds great – until they start leaving you passive-aggressive notes. “Please be quiet after 10pm. It’s not difficult.”

These landlords never speak to you directly, preferring to channel their frustrations through hostile post-it notes or e-mails.

Then, the landlord who lives upstairs, next door, or worse – in the same house. This is a special breed of crazy because they’re always watching. Always.

They’ll comment on your laundry habits, parking technique and even your choice of shoes. You wonder if they’re running a secret reality TV show where you’re the unwitting star.

Finally, we have the landlord who treats the lease like their personal rulebook of whims. They don’t just rent you an apartment; they rent you a lifestyle. You can’t put anything on the walls without their approval and heaven forbid you have overnight guests without giving them two weeks’ notice and a blood sample.

These landlords come up with bizarre regulations that seem designed to test your sanity. “No pets, no plants, no joy” might as well be their motto. I, too, feel like I’m living in an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm, but maybe, just maybe, my next landlord will be … normal. But I won’t get my hopes up.

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