Putting the brakes on wheelies

So, for six weeks she had to drive me around after my shoulder operation and, as you know, I did drive her slightly round the bend in that time.

Well, now the shoe is on the other foot, so to speak. Last week, she managed to trip and fall down three steps.

Happened in a heartbeat. One moment she was fine, but a thud, snap and blood-freezing scream later, she was on her way to hospital.

The X-ray confirmed what we already knew, and she was booked for surgery.

Fast-forward three days – but in slow motion, because with a plaster cast hugging the leg from the knee to the toes, everything happens at a snail’s pace.

But, three days later she was home, confined to the bed, except, of course, for a few daily adventures to the bathroom.

That was Thursday. I realised that being confined was having a negative impact on her mental health when, by Sunday, she demanded I search for the lost ant.

Apparently, 83 ants had come through a crack somewhere, hunting for food no doubt, but only 82 had returned home.

And how was mommy ant going to feel with one of her children lost in the big house? She badly needed a change of scenery, so I drove her to the kitchen in her wheelchair.

What a ride that turned out to be.

I never knew that a wheelchair corners very much like an oxwagon. Before we actually exited the bedroom, I was involved in a little bumper bashing.

The door frame is definitely smaller than it should be. Fortunately, the damage was minimal.

In fact, despite her objections, I really couldn’t see a chip in the polish on her toenail. Then we hit the passage. I’d rather face peak hour traffic on the highway.

To manoeuvre that chair past all the obstacles requires F1 skill, especially with the cat thinking a mechanical beast is on the loose in the house and has swallowed her mother.

Pandemonium. We did survive the first week, so from here it should be downhill all the way.

Just have to find the brake on the wheelchair before we reach the bottom.

Danie Toerien.

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