carine hartman 2021

By Carine Hartman

Chief sub-editor


Bad hair day that’s worth it

I’ve been staring at the yellow door with its bad fire engine stickers for two hours and decide: I’m having a bad hair day.


I’m sitting outside Court 21 of the family court in Germiston on my rare day off and just know I am here for the day: I’m number 11 and 2 just went in. But I have no choice – if I want to see my grandchild again after seven months, I have to sit it out. We’ve waited more than a month to get on the court roll and when my son, the unmarried father, dislocated his shoulder last night, I knew it was up to me to get this ball rolling. Mr Slick next to me is also having…

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I’m sitting outside Court 21 of the family court in Germiston on my rare day off and just know I am here for the day: I’m number 11 and 2 just went in. But I have no choice – if I want to see my grandchild again after seven months, I have to sit it out.

We’ve waited more than a month to get on the court roll and when my son, the unmarried father, dislocated his shoulder last night, I knew it was up to me to get this ball rolling.

Mr Slick next to me is also having a bad hair day. It’s his fourth appearance and he has been fighting for visitation rights for three months now, I hear. He hasn’t seen or spoken to his little boy for nearly a year. Mr Bad Tat opposite me is angry. Not that he says so, but you can feel him burning up. He constantly glares at a woman sitting a fair distance away from him.

In fact, it takes me a while to pair up the bitter couples: Hangdog-look came with his new girlfriend and flatly ignores the blonde constantly on her phone; the unmarried father scribbling furiously is linked to the cool cucumber who is the only one there with not one, but two lawyers; the mother with the kid is trying desperately to keep him from running to Daddy.

And so they one by one disappear behind the yellow door to tell Judge Judy their sorry tales. She doesn’t even take a lunch break and wears no robe “to be friendlier to the children”, she tells me much later.

“But I show them my robe,” she points to it hanging on the wall, “and tell them it’s my cape. I have superpowers.” Indeed she has. Mr Slick was beaming when he walked out and gave me the thumbs up.

Bad Tat wasn’t so happy though… And me? Seven hours later I walked out beaming too knowing we have the law on our side. So, all you unmarried fathers: don’t let your child be used as a weapon. Don’t let restraining orders keep you away. Go to court. The law understands your anger, the alienation. Judge Judy’s mission is to restore your visitation rights. Go have a bad hair day. It’s worth it.

Carine Hartman.

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