PREMIUM!

Reopen the schools, Ramaphosa, I beg you!

Columns 4 months ago

And give teachers a huge pay rise. They protect our offspring from our own attempts at education, they sanitise our darlings’ language and keep them well away from wine and tobacco.


08 May 2020
PREMIUM!
Reopen the schools, Ramaphosa, I beg you!

Teacher.

I love my daughter more than I love life itself but, honestly, it’s time for the schools to reopen. The three-year-old Egg’s teacher lied: she’s not a delight to have in class. As a matter of fact, educating daddy’s little darling is slightly more unpleasant than being mauled by a rabid mutt. Both the lovely Snapdragon and I have given up on the nightmare of trying to teach our little terror skills such as counting and naming the days of the week. If it weren’t for Ouma who showed some mercy, our hooligan would have roamed wild in her natural...

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