How would you really refund lobola?

There is no rulebook about these things, but we all know that they are just not done.

A certain gentleman by the name of GH, was so unhappy with his wife that he arranged for a meeting with the two families’ members to discuss the bride’s party refunding his lobola.

Instead of doing what the rest of us do, which is to amicably talk about the various problems that are inherent in marriage, this guy chose to go the way more difficult route. I am pretty sure that one of the reasons people just don’t even think of refunding lobola is the maths behind it. Where do you even start?

Are these two families even considering factors such as inflation, the interest rate and other financial factors? Of course, we all know that people are not comodities, but if one couple does it, imagine the number of people who might start looking through the Consumer Protection Act to see what it might say about this topic.

Of course, it is not only the men that might be unhappy in a marriage, meaning wives can also request their husbands’ families to come and collect the lobola.

These days, the number of women who earn more than their male partners is increasing, so they could just ask for a bank account and, as that rap song goes: EFT. That is why we just don’t do such things. Khethile, khethile … Till death do you part.

Yet another man has gone where none before him has treaded, and his name is Papa Penny. Aye! This legend from the province of Limpopo has not waited for other people to think that he deserves to be honoured as an integral part of the Shangaan culture (which he definitely is), so he has done it himself.

The ponytailed Papa threw modesty out the window by commissioning a life-size statue of himself to be built, and he is now in talks with the local authorities to erect it somewhere in a public space. Again, we just don’t do such things!

My gripe is with some of our leaders who are doing things that are just not done. We all know that is baby-kissing season as individuals try to be nominated for various roles, but can we please keep it sensible. You and I know that – whatever the topic may be – you need to pick a side and stick with it!

We are tired of leaders from various tripartite collaborations saying one thing, then turning around to contradict themselves when they are with a group. We just don’t do that, okay!

Sibusiso Mkhwanazi