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By Danie Toerien

Journalist


Incorporating Zimbabwe into South Africa is not so far-fetched

We have nine provinces already. What difference would another make?


Many things in the universe have been discovered by accident, like Velcro, smoke detectors, and dynamite.

I’m no scientist, but I think I may have accidentally discovered a way to really bring peace to many areas of our little planet. My theory is that politicians should just give people what they want. I’ll give you a few examples.

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The French went on a massive looting, rioting and arson spree this year when their president decided to raise the retirement age from 62 to 64. Chaos and pandemonium followed. Eventually, the courts in France agreed and despite billions of euros in damages and more billions lost in productivity, the French will now have to work until the age of 64. Ag shame.

A simpler solution would have been to lower the retirement age in France to 35 and to import labour from countries with a high unemployment rate, like South Africa.

Another burning point is the border between the United States and Mexico. Between building and breaking down walls and fences between the two countries, the fact remains that a trillion and two Mexicans want to live in the US.

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The solution is to give them what they want. And the Americans don’t have to open the border. Just make Mexico part of the US. There are already 50 odd states forming the US, so just add one more. Think about it for a minute. The Mexicans will all be living in America without going anywhere.

The same applies to South Africa and Zimbabwe. We have nine provinces already. What difference would another make? I’m no fan of the Cape-to-Cairo empire idea, but incorporating Zimbabwe into South Africa is not so far-fetched if we take a minute.

This solution will eliminate the gazillion rands worth of bribery and corruption at the border posts and at home affairs, while to a large extent nullifying the problem with “illegals”.

ALSO READ: Zimbabwean migrants: South Africa’s anti-immigrant sentiments are hindering policy reform

I’ve tested my theories on a couple of people. My sister laughed like I was a stand-up comedian, my wife suggested I should take some time off and my psychiatrist increased my medication.

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