carine hartman 2021

By Carine Hartman

Chief sub-editor


Get over your ego and change the world with love

If love saved me, then it surely can save the world? We just have to really, really get over our massive egos.


Daddy changed the world,” George Floyd’s little girl said – and he did.

Mine in any case.

Not the riots; protests; looting. Not even a cop now facing 40 years in jail for thinking he simply did his job.

For me? Floyd taught us the harsh lesson: just love each other, us humans.

Ever heard of Jackie DeShannon? Me neither, but she had a one-hit wonder that popped into my head today:

What the world needs now is love, sweet love

It’s the only thing there’s too little of…

Soppy, yes, but wait till she reminds you of the mountains and hillsides to climb, blah-blah.

Short of quoting the only passage in the Bible I take with me for the rest of my life – yeah, that one in Corinthians about love – I must admit I believe in love.

Implicitly.

Love saved my marriage.

Contradiction in terms, but I read Doubting Thomas’ apocryphal scrolls found in the Dead Sea decades ago and learnt why he was called Doubting Thomas: he didn’t blindly follow, he was the one apostle who questioned.

And he got the answers loud and clear: beware of the lion – read ego – it will eat you up.

And if you get past that ego you can love, unconditionally.

I remember my resentment; anger.

We were going on holiday the next day – but then, in the wee hours of the morning, I spotted one Doubting Thomas wisdom stuck behind the loo door: If two people live in this same house and say mountain move, it will move.

I decided right there to get over the “me”.

He hurt me. Look what he did to me…

I decided to look at what I fell in love with. It was simple: the golden hairs on his arms, tanned after a day on the beach. I just had to touch it.

And when I did, he flooded me with love. He was as hungry for love, acceptance, as me.

And our love deepened… I still battle with the “unconditional” love. My ego is huge, I realise.

Unconditional love for my kids? Yes – within limits… But I try.

If love saved me, then it surely can save the world?

We just have to really, really get over our massive egos.

Floyd, “stained” as you were, you didn’t die in vain. You united us. I hope in love.

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