Emulating Juju is so liberating

Last night, our complex held a Zoom meeting to vote on proposed new conduct rules and the lovely Snapdragon and I combined our remarkable talents for picking fights to oppose rules in general. I’m sure our neighbours think we’re infantile, but we had a ball. Just call me suburban Julius in future. And Snapdragon can be Floidette. This story has history.

A specialist suggested cannabis oil to an epilepsy sufferer in our complex and he was delighted with the results. Then he planted a cannabis pharmacy in his back yard. The trustees didn’t like this, but he enlisted an attorney and they had to back off… for a while.

Last night, they tried to sneak in a defence against the Green Threat. Propagating marijuana in a common area is prohibited, one proposed rule stated.

“Common area excludes residents’ gardens?” Snapdragon asked. “No,” said the managing agent. “Exclusive use areas fall under common area.” “Yes,” I answered. “Earmarked for private use. And the use of cannabis is legal in private.” “If you wanted a debate, why didn’t you react when we requested comments?” the agent asked. “Because the Constitutional Court has already made all the comments necessary,” I said. “Why don’t you just smoke your weed elsewhere?” the woman retaliated.

“We hate weed,” Snapdragon said. “But not as much as we hate a nanny mentality.” “Let’s just get to the next point: all the cats in the complex,” the agent said icily. “Cats control our rat problem,” Snapdragon said. The agent said: “We have made poison available for the rats.” “Eeeek!” Snapdragon said. “Poison! Now you’ve gone too far!” Afterwards, a neighbour remarked that “some people” are very rude. “But they do make valid points,” another replied. How valid we’ll see.

The results of the electronic ballot will be announced soon. We think we have taken a strong stance in defence of civil liberties. “What will happen if everyone in the complex begins to zol and plant dagga in every open spot?”

Snapdragon asked me when we went to bed. “Ag, we’ll just propose a rule change.”

Dirk Lotriet.

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