An ode to cricket: Win or lose, it’s our December-defining vibe

Oh cricket, oh cricket, with your meditative ways. You bewitch us, beguile us, on these sweet holidays.

You define our Decembers. Make those pleasant endless weeks, that a family remembers.

Whether England at Newlands; India – Centurion. Aussies at St Georges. Pakistan, Sri Lanka… even Kingsmead, bru. Ideally the Wanderers, but any test will do!

When holidays yawn long and languid before us; from right round the land, our relatives join us.

Throats open early. Over lunches and braais, restaurant outings. Ordered eisbeins. Schnitzels, and burgers or crisp chops of pork. A couple of draughts, just a Coke for me. Or a coffee, a water; a quick rooibos tea. 

December 26, the Boxing Day test. A national fixture. Iconic times. Always, wherever, the cricket abides.

SuperSport a fixture on the nation’s lounge TV. What’s that we chasing? 305? 303? De Kock and Bavuma? They must just dig in! Shoulda picked Olivier. Had Covid? Okay, but this new guy can play!

As our fortunes wane, the Indians rise. We feel the strain of their suffocating line. Wickets are lost, poor-chosen shots. It looks quite unlikely, but hope’s never lost. We cling to the cricket. Day 5! It’s alive! 

A faint edge by Mulder. Only three more to get. Ag no man! Too bad. But still, we be coping. At least we can watch. If Temba’s still there, we all keep on hoping!

Cricket, oh cricket! We appreciate you now. Through those covid-y months, with nothing to watch.

When we wondered if ever, we’d see some more shots. Quinnie’s awesome, shwashbuckling, deep-cover lofts. Markram’s impeccable, crisp mid-on drives. Van der Dussen, Dean Elgar. Marco Jansen’s arrived!

One sixty-five, for the sad loss of seven. Things not looking great for the Proteas eleven. But hey, it’s just the first, of three scheduled tests. By the time we hit Cape Town, we’ll be back to our best!  

That’s another few weeks of sweet cricket viewing. Is there anything else that you’d rather be doing?

Our ranking is poor, we’re a bit out of practice. Now we’re facing the best – Kohli fully outranks us.

Sometimes it seems that the ICC schemes we just making up numbers. Some odd little series till the next scheduled big ones.

But here where we’re sitting – though we’re not in the stadiums – it’s massive, it’s huge, this has been what we’re craving. This is cricket. It’s culture. It’s lifestyle. It’s sport!

Win, lose or draw. Not just watching, but FEELING!

It’s cricket! It’s vibes, man! That’s what it’s for.