An eye-roll is simply not ‘woke’

We’d all like to think we’re free spirits, flushing rules down the toilet. I’ve certainly lived my “make love, not war”, hippie pants complete, since I’ve left my mother’s knee.

I’ve bought into the unconditional love, tolerating all and sundry – sometimes with an eye-roll. But did I roll my eyes just now… Did you see you can now be cited at work for rolling your eyes?

It’s apparently right up there with office bullying, nepotism and using swear words in front of your colleagues (the researchers obviously didn’t spend a day at anewspaper office?)

I am for sure fired tomorrow because I roll my eyes constantly – especially at men. And before you accuse me of spewing vitriol at the opposite sex I so love, I have to.

Risqué jokes – still flying after all these years but so unwoke nowadays – deserve an eye-roll. And there I just rolled my eyes again: “woke”. I ask you. I woke with a hangover is all I will admit too and that’s probably “unwoke” because who drinks nowadays? Or smokes? Unwoke me.

Call me a creature of habit: early morning coffee and a ciggie; sonsakker on my stoep not complete without a ciggie. Now you may roll your eyes all you want…

And while we’re all at it, let me tell you what a modern-day etiquette expert says: It’s a bad habit, rude and – if you believe her – men do it as often. It is also a sign you are heading for the divorce court: according to researcher John Gottman, eyerolling, along with a few other disrespectful gestures such as
sarcasm and name-calling, are the biggest predictors of divorce.

Eye rolling is a strong signal that your partner is frustrated. But back to the etiquette expert in a manner of speaking.

When asked how to deal with a “hurtful” friend who always rolls her eyes when she disagrees, her answer was an eye-roller: “Instead of giving the same eye-roll back, say something like, ‘It looks like you disagree with what I’m saying. I would love for you to share your thoughts.’ It may allow the eye-roller to express their feelings of frustration.”

Disrespectful? Name-calling? Sarcasm? Come on, people. Woke up. An eye-roll is simply cute. I hope my boss agrees…