Five golden rules of etiquette for family gatherings

Learn the proper way of behaving yourself at a family gathering to avoid negative feelings.


The public holiday on Youth Day, June 16, is just around the corner, and family and friends will spot this as a perfect time to catch up with each other, travel across diverse towns and cities to reconnect, spend quality time together, reminisce about great memories and flaunt all their achievements to each other.

Even though family gatherings are supposed to be about enjoying time with extended family and jogging each other’s memory about the importance of being together, going to your cousin’s house – who is your least preferred family member – can be awful, especially when you are not sure what rules of etiquette have to be observed at family gatherings. Knowing the right manner in which to conduct yourself can make your June 16 holiday enjoyable and crisis-free.

  1. STAY COMPOSED AND THOUGHTFUL

It’s true that you can’t cherry-pick family and it’s not your fault that you have that one relative that somehow believes that it’s okay to spot faults in others. Every family has one of those. This is the family member that always makes sure to remind you that you have added weight or lost your car, and makes it seem as if they actually care that you are without a job and that you are looking old. When you come across this relative at the family gathering, remember to just smile briefly, remain calm and let them know that it’s great to see them again, and exit the conversation.

  1. DON’T ATTEMPT TO OUTPERFORM OTHERS

It’s decent to share your accomplishments with family. This can serve to motivate them and you to strive for bigger and better achievements, but talking about yourself all the time can be bothersome. You don’t want to be that relative that other family members avoid talking to and be side-lined from other activities because you are allegedly big-headed. Complimenting others on their successes works wonders, try that approach too.

  1. GO SLOW ON THE DRINKS

There is nothing wrong with drinking and enjoying a few glasses of wine or other alcohol with family, however too much drinking can lead you to get drunk and embarrass yourself in the midst of people who hold you in high esteem. It’s logical to be in control of your actions, so drink with caution.

  1. DON’T RULE THE FOOD TABLE

It’s spot-on that “sharing is caring”, overrated as it might sound. Irrespective of cheesecake being your favourite cake of all time, it’s impolite and uncharitable to take more than one serving before making certain that everyone else has also had a serving already. Everybody that is well-mannered knows that adults get served first and then the children. Manners are fundamental when it comes to family gatherings.

  1. LET THE PAST STAY IN THE PAST

At this time, dialogues that can spark quarrels need to be dodged and only positive memories should be shared. This is a time to remind each other of those fond memories you have as a family. Keep the chat light and fun.

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