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By Citizen Reporter

Journalist


The rhythm of courtship is increased in speed-dating

It is not impossible (though it's highly unlikely) that a guy will whip out a Shakespearean quote during a speed-dating session.


Romantic fare such as, “Hear my soul speak, the very instant that I saw you, did my heart fly to your service,” from The Tempest is not generally the order of the day.

However, there is something to be said about the romantic yearnings of people on a crusade to find their life partners. The idea of love and the precepts that go along with its foundation has rapidly changed as social media and the Internet has made prospective partners more accessible.

Fewer stories about meeting a partner at a braai, club or through mutual friends mark the rapid change in how relationships are viewed. There is now no shame in the speed-dating game, as Heston Thomas found.

“There is a great risk of getting embarrassed when you approach a girl on the street,” Thomas says.

“I don’t take very well to rejection, but at speed-dating sessions everybody knows what they are there for, thus removing the element of possible rudeness.”

It is true that speed-dating can save unnecessary time engaged in small talk with strangers only to find out that they are spoken for. These sessions can eliminate time-wasting, but the allotted five minutes is hardly enough to make a proper impression.

“I work with video, and two minutes can be a long time, so five minutes is more than enough,” says Ntombi Zandile Tu.

CREATIVE. Some speed dating companies even have set topics that potential couples have to discuss. Picture: Getty Images.

CREATIVE. Some speed dating companies even have set topics that potential couples have to discuss. Picture: Getty Images.

“First impressions last and you can determine the basics within that short space of time. You can discuss what you both want from a relationship, if you have kids, what kind of job you do – basically anything under the sun, except for the weather because there is a limited amount of time. It works for me because guys don’t have the courage to walk up to a girl and ask for her number anymore.”

Gugu Nkuna founded a dating service, Quick Date, which was born out of a need to formalise what she was already doing.

“My friends were always asking me to hook them up with people, which was cool, but I also identified a gap in the market,” starts Nkuna.

“I had been to some speed sessions as well, and most of the time there was a shortage of black people at these sessions, so it made sense for me to consider this market when I started my own business.

Some view the fact that speed-dating involves a fee takes the “purity” out of the romance or a potential love connection.

“Look at the advent of reality TV with competitions such as The Bachelor, The Protege etc, all centred around making an impression quickly. Love has become a commodity and speed dating is just an extension of that,” said Sibonile Mpendukana .

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