Should you remain friends with an anti-vaxxer?

Relationships are being torn apart by diverse and strong opinions regarding the Covid-19 vaccine. How far are you willing to go for what you believe in?


We’ve all been asked the question or even asked the question: “Are you getting the jab?”

As with anything in life, there will always be someone on the opposite side. This time around, it just seems to be a matter of life or death for many as anti-vaxxers take a stand and refuse to back down while those who are for the Covid-19 vaccine struggle to understand their opponents’ logic.

What do the stats actually say about anti-vaxxers?

In 2019, the World Health Organization (WHO) included vaccine hesitancy and the reluctance or refusal to immunise despite vaccine availability under their list of top 10 threats to global health.

According to author Jonathan M. Berman, who recently wrote the book Anti-Vaxxers: How to Challenge a Misinformed Movement, “people change their own minds; we can’t do it for them”.

Even actress Jennifer Aniston has been taking a stand, saying that “it’s tricky because everyone is entitled to their own opinion – but a lot of opinions don’t feel based on anything except fear or propaganda”.

In a recent Instagram post, she shares that she has been fully vaccinated and that “it feels so good”.

She added: “As we know, the health of one of us affects all of us.”

Jennifer Aniston
Jennifer Aniston, proud to have been vaccinated. Picture: Instagram

So, what is the verdict then? Are you meant to unfriend the friend you’ve had for 20 years over his refusal of the jab? Are you supposed to divorce your life-long partner because he or she is an anti-vaxxer? Or, is there a way to deal with all of this in a civilised way?

Social media’s influence

People have been bombarded with facts and fiction about the coronavirus globally and social media has been playing a huge role in distributing information, whether it’s true facts or false rumours.

Although Facebook has been banning all false and misleading statements about Covid-19 and its vaccines, there is still a grey area that might contribute to vaccine hesitancy by playing on people’s fears.

According to The Washington Post, Facebook has partnered with more than 60 health experts around the globe, routinely studying a wide variety of content to inform its policies.

Facebook spokesperson, Dani Lever told The Washington Post that “public health experts made it clear that tackling vaccine hesitancy is a top priority in the Covid-19 response”, which is why Facebook launched its global campaign, connecting two billion people to reliable information from health experts and removing false claims about Covid-19 and vaccines.

ALSO READ: Registered for the vaccine? All your questions answered here.

Dealing with anti-vaxxers

People have different ways of dealing with different challenges and the Covid-19 pandemic is definitely not a challenge for the fainthearted. Some people cut friends and family members from their lives when they learn that they believe Covid-19 is fake or when they say they admit to being anti-vaxxers. Others play the avoidance card.

Of course, it also brings about some awkwardness due to unspoken tension and people are being uninvited to special family gatherings and even weddings. Still, there are people who have patience with the most bizarre vaccine-related comments.

According to Johns Hopkins Medicine, there is a continuum of vaccine acceptance. It ranges from categorical rejection of vaccines to hesitancy about vaccines. People are influenced by so many sources and seek answers for so many questions and therefore, the ideal is to rather target and address attitudes, social processes, motivation and access, than individuals or personalities.

Anti-vaxxers
Is your friendship with your anti-vaxxer friend doomed? Picture: iStock

Try these tactics

It is said that dialogue-based interventions are the way to go when you want to address your friend or family member’s vaccine hesitancy.

Although there is a difference between being vaccine hesitant and an anti-vaxxer, some of these tips might help you bridge the gap either way:

  • Determine how open your friend is to listen to what you have to say. Some people are rather set it their ways of thinking when it comes to Covid-19, especially after subscribing to dangerous Covid-19 theories like those from the recent ‘Plandemic’ documentary.
  • Be prepared. Anti-vaxxers will come with a lot of “facts” and although you might feel the urge to respond with facts yourself, getting into a back and forth won’t help. Therefore, know your facts, but don’t use it as bait or as a tool to win a fight.
  • Have the vaccine conversation one-on-one, face-to-face. Too many friendships have been ended over misunderstandings via social media. If not in person, consider a video chat through a platform like WhatsApp.
  • Listen and empathise. Non-vaxxers really believe what they believe just like individuals who are pro-vaccines believe that it could be the only solution. Therefore, having patience, really listening to anti-vaxxers’ arguments and empathising with their situation might keep friendships from falling apart.

In the end, perhaps agreeing to disagree is the way to go. If not and you feel very strongly about the fact that anti-vaxxers are jeopardising the population’s herd immunity, keeping your distance from those who make your blood boil, might just be what you (and they) need.

Sometimes friendships are just seasonal, and it’s okay.

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Coronavirus (Covid-19) Health

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