With 2,25 billion cups consumed daily, don’t let your brew taste like dishwater!

More than two and a quarter billion cups of coffee are consumed every day. That means that around the world, almost three quarters of a billion cups are enjoyed every year. It’s a lot of it, but then again, there’s nothing as delicious as a perfect cup of coffee and, in turn, very few disappointments compare to an eatery that serves up recycled dish water at a pretty steep price.

Ordering a cup of coffee is not cheap. And a pit stop for a caffeine kick can hurt you beyond your pocket i if it tastes just like the paper that your card bill is printed on.

At under thirty bucks, a Wimpy coffee is still the best value for money. It combines taste, price and quantity. There’s something innately romantic about a Wimpy coffee, whether it’s the pitstop enjoyed while road tripping down to the coast or that slight roasted aroma that it shares or the mostly consistent moreish-ness of its blend. It’s tough to beat, and for a filter coffee. Wimpy is also the home of the original flat white, before it received a ponytail brand name. The convenience restaurant has served its milky brew in that fashion for decades.

Coffee is at its best, black

But the best way to enjoy a coffee is black, with no sugar or only a wee bit. Just enough to take the bitterness edge off for more sensitive palettes.

Arbour Café in Birchacres, close to the Wanderers cricket stadium, is a fantastic treasure. Here, the Americanos have a deep roasted flavour, cappuccinos are frothy, and teaspoons stand to attention when they serve lattes. It’s the kind of place that’s designed around conversation, from the sunny courtyard in the back end to the Parisian feel of its foreshop, the smiling staff that seem to know when to bug you and when to stay away. Indulge in the fresh cake, because it really is fresh, moist and miles better than many of its contemporaries when measuring with a carrot cake yardstick.

Sneezing is not pleasing

Previously, lekker is an East Rand coffee shop cum café situated in a nursery. It’s called Cafe Ambrosia and the environment, outside under the trees, or cosily inside on cottage pine furniture. The menu is fabulous, with great and different options like minced curry on an open toastie, savouries and when in stock, delicious cakes. But I was turned off for life recently when seated inside.

From a few tables inside Café Ambrosia there’s a direct view into the kitchen. And that’s when I saw a kitchen staffer, busy peeling potatoes, sneeze without turning her head away. The spud had a shower, but not the kind that’s appetising.

When I called the manager to share my concern, she was, to her credit, very apologetic. From the table, she hollered into the kitchen and told off Sneezy, turned back and shared that she would instruct said staffer to don a mask, discard the freshly irrigated potatoes and put on some gloves. It seemed like an equitable solution. But it never happened. The kitchen worker paused and, when she figured it was safe, continued peeling potatoes. The same potatoes. No mask, no gloves, no nothing.

It was impossible to finish my coffee, despite it being quite a good cuppa. It was even more challenging to even face the plate when breakfast arrived. Sneezy had me a bit wheezy.

West Rand coffee haven

On the West Rand there’s an outlet called Foood. It’s a three oh store with two outlets, one in Cresta and the other a few kilos down the drag in Randpark. Like Wimpy, their filter coffees are affordable, the service good, the meals remind of Juicy Lucy in the good old days of franchise diversity, and best of all, if you smoke or vape, there’s a spot for you.

And then there’s probably one of the best cups of coffee I have had for months. It’s at a place called The Daily, and it’s in a town called Delareyville, about two- and a-bit hours outside Joburg. Apparently, they have outlets in Pretoria and Randburg, too. But here, a blend of Brazilian and Ethiopian coffee is like reading a love story, a romance novel of note. Actually, it’s more like the Fifty Shades of Grey of the palette, because it’s so seductively delicious that you cannot help but fall both in love and lust with this blend.

There is no way that I’ll travel past The Daily in Randburg when next in the area, or drive to the capital city to sample some more. That’s how good this blend is. And best of all, it’s not priced beyond the notes of its flavour. For goldilocks connoisseurs’, it’s just right.

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