Most couples reach a stage in their relationship when their sexual routine (or what we call their sexual script), becomes rather predictable and boring… and there’s nothing sexy about predictable now is there?
Follow these 5 tips to bring the sexy back into your relationship:
Date night – you may think this idea is a cliché or silly, but the positive impact that date night can have on your relationship will be felt long after you’ve paid the bill. Make an effort to surprise each other, flirt, dress up and try something new. Something as simple as going bowling together can bring some excitement and anticipation back in to your relationship.
Talk about it – most couples think they are good at communicating, but they are actually not. Does one of you want to talk now and the other says I’m fine? If so, you need to reevaluate how you talk and make an effort to get communication to be constructive not destructive. What happens outside of the bedroom means you’ll want to get into the bedroom slower or faster… or not at all.
Make sex a normal topic – everyone has sex, but no one talks about it. Research has actually found that couples that talk about sex when they are not in the throes of passion are actually having more sex, because they are open, honest and know how to pleasure their partner. If you find the topic awkward, start by reminiscing about sex you’ve had with your partner, or use a movie scene or magazine article to break the ice.
Touch and kiss – sex should not be all about sexual intercourse. Sex is about the buildup, the excitement and anticipation, the intimacy, the eroticism, the sharing and the mystery. You don’t have to have sex every time you want to pleasure each other. Rather focus on other things you can do to satisfy each other and focus more on the overall pleasure than on only the end goal of reaching orgasm.
Spend time apart – in a lot of relationships, overfamiliarity can lead to decreased desire. Why? Well if you know that you’re partner is always available, you’re likely to want them less than if you know you won’t be with them every minute of the day… and that goes beyond working hours! Have nights with your friends, have time apart to miss your partner, and enjoy time alone. It’s really quite true what they say about absence making the heart grow fonder.
