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By Karabo Motsiri Mokoena

Writer. Conversationalist. South African Mommy Blogger,Content Producer


When can you have sex again after having a baby?

Women's bodies go through a lot when they give birth.


Romance after childbirth will not be what it used to be before the woman gives birth. Postpartum recovery can be a long and lonely process.

Some women tear, some recover from c-section stitching, prolonged bleeding, backaches and many other realities of childbirth make sex the last thing on a lot of woman’s minds.

Besides recovery, having a small baby can be very overwhelming. Newborns are very demanding and require a lot of care and attention.

All of these may be a recipe for disaster for couples that are trying to ignite the romance flame.

According to Mayo Clinic, there isn’t a definite waiting period for couples to have sex after childbirth, regardless of the birthing method. Drs, however, recommend that couples avoid sex for the first 6 weeks after childbirth.

This is mainly because complications are more likely to happen 2 weeks after giving birth.

According to sex expert Dr. Tlaleng Mofokeng, well known as Dr. T, Drs only discourage penetration during those first few weeks. Couples can therefore still be romantic and sexual during that time.

In her book A Guide to Sexual Health and Pleasure, Dr. T redefines what sex is for individuals. She explores other methods of being intimate with your partner without the need for penetration.

According to the Raising Children Network, spending time together and communicating openly are great ways of staying connected. Sex can be a build-up from staying emotionally connected to your partner. Cuddles and physical affection play an important role in the relationship.

A lot of women feel unattractive after giving birth, and sex requires some confidence. A woman’s body goes through a lot when they bear children.

There are a lot of ways that partners can make new moms feel sexy and confident after giving birth. Fatherly looks at a few:

  • Reminding her that she will always be sexy
  • Complimenting her
  • Taking care of her and helping her with some chores
  • Flirting with her

The more women feel loved and appreciated, the more beautiful and confident they become.

This is important, not only for her but for the wellbeing of the relationship as well.

“The sex will always come” Dr. T passionately states.

The focus is to work on the relationship and the individuals in it first, then everything else will fall into place.

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