How to navigate the dating world in your 30s

Equipped with the right advice and encouragement, dating in your 30s can be like having your cake and eating it too.


F Scott Fitzgerald once lamented how, among other pitfalls, being 30 is the promise of a decade of loneliness and a thinning list of single men to know.

Not very encouraging words for those of us who fall into this age group and are still hoping to grab a fulfilling morsel in the bustling and highly competitive Meet Market.

Once, the dating game used to be so easy and we were armed with our immortal smugness and exacting standards that only youth offered, and then suddenly we were not a carefree 20-something anymore, and adulting took over in full force.

Now, even with being a little surer of yourself and knowing what you’re looking for, one would expect that making a decision about a lifelong mate would be easier.

However, with online dating taking the place of face-to-face mingling, you find your time is spent kissing mostly frogs as you scramble for your prince.

So, with time now a commodity and the realisation that immortality expired in your 20s, what should you know about dating in your 30s?

Picture: iStock

Experts at Elite Singles, one of South Africa’s best online dating sites for single professionals, have these tips to offer:

Deal breakers are real: Unlike when you were 21 and it wasn’t a big deal if you didn’t want children, your relationship goals are now more future-focused. So, if your goals and values aren’t in line, move along.

Ain’t nobody got time for that: Post-30 age group, time becomes more valued. Don’t waste time on dead-end dates! You’ve got stuff to do.

Tricks are for kids: Both single men and single woman have engaged in the power play because, let’s be honest, feeling hard-to-get is a great ego boost. This takes time and you could still end up alone. Dating in your 30s is about getting real, so cut to the chase.

The rules have changed: Don’t be late. Ghosting is for kids, share real details on your dating profile and remember that basic manners go a long way.

Technology is awesome: Finding and meeting real people is now more accessible, thanks to the best dating apps now boasting some of the best matchmaking algorithms out there. Make use of them.

Remember: It’s not all doom and gloom when dating in your 30s. With these tips and others available online, you can take all the wins and losses in your stride and save yourself from time wasters and heartbreakers. And, if you play it right, you can have your cake and eat it too.

For more tips, log on to www.elitesingles.com/over-30-dating

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