What Sello Maake has learnt about his abusive past

Sello Maake kaNcube opened up about his childhood and domestic abuse like never before during an interview with Dineo Ranaka and Sol Phenduka on Kaya FM. 

Ncube’s career has been well documented in South Africa, he has appeared in iconic roles in Generations, Scandal! and as a flamboyant Kgosi in Mzansi Magic’s The Queen.

The actor’s interview with Ranaka and Phenduka first touched on his childhood in Atteridgeville, Pretoria and how his love for dancing developed at a young age because of the area. 

He surprisingly revealed he used to be a basketball player and his nickname was “Magnetism”. Another surprising fact is his love for peanut butter. 

Sello Maake kaNcube on his abusive past

The actor owned up that he wasn’t the best partner with some women in his past relationships.

KaNcube admitted he was an abusive partner. 

The Blood Pslams actor has been married twice before, his current wife is Pearl Mbewe. KaNcube says he first noticed his traits of being violent with his first girlfriend whilst living with his biological father when he was 24 years. 

ALSO READ: ‘She saved my life’ – Sello Maake kaNcube praises his wife

“By living with him, he said something that was almost an echo of what I said to my girlfriend.” KaNcube realised that his temperament comes from his father, which allowed him to self-introspect and change his behaviour. 

Ranaka asked if he ever hit a woman, and KaNcube answered he was being modest with his story and said, “yes, I have”. 

The radio presenter and reality star further asked if he had rehabilitated himself, to which he answered he did. 

“Through introspection, I also realised the drivers [of being abusive], one of the drivers was insecurity, and the other thing is I have a stutter. So when I am agitated, I mumble. So when you get agitated and you stammer and in that frustration, you lash out.”

He said giving himself time-outs also assisted in his rage and dealing with his wrongful behaviour. 

Healing

According to kaNcube he stopped being physically abusive in 1984 and “relapsed” in 2000, however, he didn’t delve into that incident. 

He further stated as long as he lives he will never hit a woman again.

Ranaka said she appreciated the legendary actor’s honesty, as she finds it “baffling” how in relationships, situations get to physical violence, adding his words are powerful and more importantly rehabilitating yourself for personal healing. 

KaNcube is currently a gender base violence activist, helping men across the country deal with their emotional, physical and mental health.

The actor said he is now at peace, particularly with his wife Mbewe by his side.