How to tell if your teenager is depressed

Is your teen sad for a significant length of time? Do they isolate themselves from family or friends? Do they cry or are irritable, moody and get angry quickly? Has their appetite changed and show signs of an eating disorder? Do they lose concentration as well? If they display one or more of the signs, your child could be depressed. Depression doesn’t only affect adults but kids and teens and in fact, depression is ranked as the tenth leading cause of death among children over 10 years old. Depression happens when you experience feelings that range from a temporary feeling of sadness, confusion or an inability to cope.

How to react to your child’s depression

No one knows your child best than you and their well-being is the most important issue. When your child displays signs of depression, you have to speak to your child before the situation becomes worse. Tell them you have noticed that there seems to be something bothering them and then let them speak at their own pace. Whatever they tell you, do not be judgemental. It is important that they feel they can confide in you. But be warned, your child may refuse to speak to you because children sometimes find it difficult confiding in their parents about certain subjects. If this is the case, you must ask them if there is someone that they may feel more comfortable speaking to.

Search for answers 

When they refuse to confide in you, look for clues that may explain why they are going through depression. It might be a good idea to check their computers, iPads, cell phones, etc., to make sure they are not involved in anything bad or dangerous. Try to ask them first and not just snoop around. Feeling untrusted is a sure-fire way to undo all the help you’re trying to give them. If you don’t make a breakthrough, speak to their close friends, a teacher or a school guidance counsellor, as they may be able to offer you some clues. Otherwise check whether your teen has gone through or is going through the following:

• Did they just experience a break-up?
• Have they found a new group of friends recently?
• Are they acting or dressing differently lately?
• Are they wearing long sleeves or covering their arms or wrists? This could be a sign of cutting.

Get help

You cannot hope that all these feelings will go away on their own. You need to look for help in your area. Guidance counsellors at the school may be able to steer you in the right direction. Make sure you discuss this with your teen child first. If your child is not comfortable with the therapist or help you have chosen, then find someone else. Try, also, to involve your teen in an activity that they enjoy. Being active and being around those who share their interests can be a very positive experience and outlet for your teen child. Remember that mending from depression takes time. Be patient with your child and hold their hand as they navigate these feelings that are confusing to them.