MY STORY : Pastor or sangoma? Torn between two worlds

‘WHAT should I choose – being a pastor or becoming a sangoma? I’m so confused,’

A Port Durnford church leader, Pastor Zikhali (49), says he is facing the toughest decision of his life.

He feels trapped between a rock and a hard place, but has to now choose between his church and following Christianity, or pursue his new calling of being a traditional healer.

Zikhali is a known ‘man of God’ in his area, a leader and a true Christian, but for some time traditional healers have been telling him he has a calling to become a sangoma.

His dilemma started when he became sick and had to be hospitalised last year.

‘I was in and out of hospitals, but the doctors couldn’t find anything wrong, even though I was in great pain. I had terrible headaches, stomach cramps and even started hallucinating.

‘My congregation constantly prayed for my health to improve, but nothing changed.

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‘It wasn’t long before I started having dreams about my late grandmother. In my dreams she told me to come back home and she would take me to a river.

‘While in hospital I had recurring dreams of my grandmother, but couldn’t grasp their meaning.’

According to Zikhali, it was when he shared the hospital room with a traditional healer’s son that he learned the meaning of his dreams.

‘His father, a sangoma, informed me my sickness was because my ancestors were calling me to be a sangoma. ‘As a Christian I didn’t really understand and was confused.

‘I thought it was just a joke, until my sickness worsened and he later explained everything to me.

‘The old man said I had a gift to heal people. Failing to accept it would result in me being cursed to a point where I would become a lunatic, even believing I was Jesus Himself.

‘The next day, my grandmother again returned in a dream and repeated what the man had said. I started having strong visions and that’s when I realised this could be true.

‘My church doesn’t believe in sangomas, traditional medicine or ancestors. I don’t know whether to continue being a preacher or to follow this new calling.

‘But how can I follow the traditional route after I have, for years, told my congregation the real power is in prayer?

‘How will I even introduce this topic to them without being judged?

‘I have constantly advised them against any muthi practices because I believed Christianity was the only religion which made sense.’

Zikhali told the ZO he is now consulting with ‘higher preachers’ to determine whether the two religions or beliefs cannot work together for the greater good.

He hopes he won’t have to choose one from the other, but can use both his powers to heal people in church and in his community.

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