MY STORY: My dead parents demanded of me to marry them

‘A VISIT to a sangoma changed my life,’

So says an eSikhaleni mother of two after being subjected to ‘bad luck’ and family deaths most of her life.

Thuli (55) consulted a local sangoma and was shocked when the medicine man revealed the reason behind her misfortune.

Through the sangoma her deceased parents demanded that she must conduct a proper wedding ceremony for them.

Since both her parent died in the 1970s, Thuli says she was shocked by the request.

‘The sangoma told me heeding the request would be the only way I would rid myself of all the bad luck and gain a better life.’

According to her, after receiving the message she started having dreams of her parents demanding for the ceremony to be conducted.

‘I soon learned that when my mother married my father in the early fifties, some of the rituals were not conducted which resulted in the marriage not being blessed by the ancestors.

‘The sangoma said this was the cause of our family’s spate of bad luck, which included my several miscarriages and the death of all my siblings,’

Thuli told the ZO her ‘bad luck’ caused her severe trauma. She even had people threatening to kill her several times.

‘I just didn’t know what was happening. All I knew was that bad things always happened to me. I was close to death many times and was assaulted for no reason by strangers, not to mention my community and friends who turned their backs on me for no reason.

‘A traditional wedding is a symbol of our African culture and if not done right, it can cause a lot of trouble for the generation which follows,’ Thuli said.

‘It was difficult, especially with my husband, a Christian, who doesn’t believe in our rituals. But it had to be done otherwise the bad luck would target my children.

‘During the planning process of marrying my dead parents, they both came to me in a dream and told me how it should be done. That’s when I realised this was serious. ‘It was the only way to I could become free and live my life without worrying what was going to happen to me next.

Two cows had to be slaughtered, the groom’s gifts had to be bought, a kist was purchased and everything needed for a traditional wedding was put in place.

‘I obviously had to conduct the wedding on their behalf and complete all the rituals. The ceremony had to be conducted exactly as it would have been in the 50s. Even the food had to reflect their lives,’

Last month Thuli finally conducted the wedding for her late parents, with her cousins standing in for them.

According to her, her back luck has disappeared since the ceremony and even her friends have come back to her.

‘We might be influenced by Western culture, but we are still Africans.

‘I took me years to understand what was happening, but I am glad I finally sorted it out and now my children won’t suffer,’