Pet fire safety?…
I am sick of seeing people mistreat their pet fires, abusing them, neglecting them, starving them and just outright being mean to them.
Now that my rant is over I am going to give you some key pointers on keeping your pet fire safe.
Firstly, NO water. Water to fire is like arsenic to people, it’s a definite no-no. I once saw some inhumane villain give water to his pet fire, the pet fire sizzled and screamed in agony as the water ‘burnt’ deep into its skin – it was a fast death but must have been excruciating.
Secondly you will need to monitor who your pet fire befriends. As with people there are a number of bad influences out there. For instance don’t let your pet fire near uncle cracker, uncle cracker is a volatile being and when exposed to your pet fire, well the results can be explosive.
Remember your pet fire is a needy little critter and you do need to feed him or her, just be careful what you feed your pet fire, I prefer feeding mine some bark, a few leaves and maybe a marshmallow or two just to keep her sweet.
Be careful not to overfeed mind you, pet fires consume just about everything you put in their path and will leave traces, remnants of their last meal and be sure to watch their weight, they can grow out of hand if left unattended, in a field, mall, or even your own kitchen.
