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Just because your visa’s been revoked, the airline you were planning on using to go on holiday has suspended all flights, and the border to your destination has been closed – not to mention Cyril’s three-week stay at home – doesn’t mean your holiday is ruined. It’s just been reinvented.
The concept of a staycation is not a new one but with lockdown, it’s taken on a whole new importance. The original motivation for staycationing was spending less money, generating less carbon and – yes, honestly – having a stress-free holiday. How often have you returned from holiday needing, well, a holiday?
So here are some recipes for a staycation with flair and panache. You don’t need much, but it helps if you have some standby staples such as sporting equipment, a kiddies’ sandpit and a few hammocks and/or loungers.
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This is a bit easier if you have a pool, but it’s not essential.
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The earth is 70% ocean, and the concentration of salt and electrolytes in sea water is similar to blood plasma so, wherever you are, the sea is a part of you.
Kick back by finding a sunny or shady spot in the garden, get the kids busy building sand castles and settle down with a good book. If it gets too hot, fill the bath with cold water – and some bubble bath if you like – and take a dip every so often, pretending you are at Clifton.
Depending on additives, use it to water plants or flush the loo when your day at the beach is over. But beach holidays are also about summer nights.
String up some pretty lights in the garden, strip the hibiscus bush of flowers and create an island paradise with some reggae, calypso, sega or marrabenta music and have a steamy laid-back summer beach night. (Best send the kids to bed).
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Unless you are totally self-isolating, you can still do a round of golf – only 18 holes, though, as the 19th is out of bounds. But even if you are not leaving your own back yard, all is not lost.
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Design and build a course on the lawn by planting a few plastic tumblers at strategic points – that sandpit could come in handy again as a bunker.
You may need to brainstorm with your family to come up with some new rules and/or handicaps. For example, the person who actually owns and regularly uses the golf clubs has to do all their shots standing on one leg or if the dog takes your ball, you have to hit it from where she drops it.
Obviously, you can wear whatever you like, but those silly plus-fours in a vibrant check pattern would really set the mood.
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Spa holidays are ideally suited to staycations. You can do this alone, with your partner, a friend or the family. Depending on how much time you have, you can do it as a realtime quid pro quo, or you can take it in turns to be the pampered and the pamperee.
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This is a wonderful way to spend time with people you really love and value.
Mutual grooming is a valuable bonding ritual for all primates, including humans. I wouldn’t suggest anything that requires real skill (unless you are skilled but then this is likely to be a bit of a busman’s holiday).
Give each other manicures or pedicures, or just put on a face pack and chill and chat. Whatever you do, don’t forget to put cucumber slices on your eyes. I’m not sure they serve any purpose, but they complete the picture.
If you can find some rasul mud, you can combine two different but complementary cultures by building a Native American sweat lodge at the bottom of the garden. If it’s a sunny day you don’t even really need to light a fire, it will get pretty hot and steamy anyhow.
And then you can end it all off with some yoga or straightforward relaxation. As a special treat for your favourite man, you can do a hot towel, full-service shave – but it’s best to not use a cut-throat razor unless you know what you’re doing.
This is a great one. Unless you live on the 10th floor of a block of flats, you can do a safari without leaving home. Actually, even the 10th floor has possibilities.
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This is a great way to really look at your close environment. Even suburban gardens have a surprising range of wildlife ranging from chameleons and mice to porcupines and in some areas, even caracal, baboon and bokkies.
Even if you only have a few square metres of garden, look carefully, under the plants, dig into the soil, and watch – really watch – what all the little critters are doing.
If you don’t have a hand lens or loupe to closely examine teensy weensy creatures or plants, look through your binoculars the wrong way. You would be amazed at how many birds you can spot in (or from) the average suburban garden if you just sit quietly in one place for a while.
If you have a good view of the sunset, you can complete the experience by setting up a table and folding chairs in the garden and serving sundowners from a cooler box, with biltong and other snacks. Then you can do a game drive on the Nat Geo Channel.
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This year’s Hajj has been cancelled and as most pilgrimages tend to involve lots of people converging on a holy place, perhaps this is not a good time to join the throngs heading to Jerusalem/ Mecca/Santiago de Compostela/ Lourdes/India or the Vatican – assuming you could even get into the relevant country.
But a pilgrimage does not need to be external and self-isolation certainly lends itself to self-examination.
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This is a good time to reconsider how we live in the world, but there are really no hard and fast rules about pilgrimage.
You can meditate, pray, make offerings to your garden deities, read a holy book, seek visions, fast, or do whatever you think is the best way to get in touch with God and/or your inner spiritual self – or reconnect with the world and/or the universe. It’s all about you and your beliefs.
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Of course, nothing can beat actually going to some great place on holiday but, if you had your heart set on (and bookings for) Italy, China, Mexico, New York, wherever, you can still get some of that experience. This could involve the whole family in a truly fantastic extended role play.
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Play the relevant music while you build a sort-of film set of the destination from all the scrap you have gathered. This is a great thing to do with kids – especially if they were looking forward to an overseas holiday.
Prepare a traditional meal – or perhaps just the likely street food you’d find there. Then dress up.
There are two choices here – you can dress as you would have if you were going there, or you can dress in a traditional costume of the region (this is fantasy, remember, so accuracy is not really that big a deal).
Speak to each other in the language of the target country, read relevant books about the destination, watch videos, and then discuss your experiences.
It doesn’t all have to be fantasy – with some help from the web, you could learn to tango, learn to cook the relevant cuisine, or even walk through a virtual art gallery. Then, like a Victorian-era explorer, sketch what you have seen, rather than taking photos.
This particular staycation offers a fabulous bonus activity – you can use social media to find a willing friend in the destination and then Skype them so you can live vicariously through the other and enjoy an overseas holiday.
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