I have seen relationships where couples are constantly in one another’s company, day in and day out.
They cling to each other as they get drinks, visit the lavatory, stand in the same room and leave to go to their residence, where they live together.
Nope. This is unhealthy and won’t work for me.
As much as I love and adore my other half, he can get a little much sometimes and that’s when I desperately need an hour or 48 to myself.
I think the feeling is mutual most of the time, although he is just too much of a gentleman to say so… or more likely, just petrified of the words, “What did you just say?”
We’re both perfectly comfortable if one of us is spending time at a friend’s house on a Friday afternoon.
We return home together in good moods and have so much to talk about, having spent the better part of a day apart.
I call it our ‘skinnertyd’.
Us-time is so much better when you get that blissful me-time beforehand, reading a book or watching a movie while the other one is out doing who knows what.
Your relationship definitely needs a strong trust foundation for you to spend time apart, but I’m happy to report that it works wonders.
I read somewhere that women are more prone to crave me-time than men do, so when we start getting too cranky or complaining about space or privacy, please let us be and go have a drink somewhere or just… go mow the lawn, or something.
Couples who are too much in each others’ faces all the time and don’t allow each other space are more prone to fight or get irritated with each other than couples who give each other breaks.
That being said, please don’t go out and see me-time as a free pass to create mischief and damage a trusting relationship.
We all know our limits, so don’t go there.
A relationship can suffer disastrous effects when couples are too clingy and in some cases this can even lead to a break-up.
Small sacrifices can make huge improvements and lead to happier times.
Me-time means relaxing and doing whatever you want without interruption or complaining. Again, this must be kept within limits, please. One must not be stupid.
But imagine my ecstatic reaction when my darling husband told me he was going on a hunting trip with friends for the weekend.
A child seeing a pony for the first time would probably not have beaten my excited squeal.
My first reaction was, ‘When are you going?’
I can’t say he was too impressed with the gigantic smile on my face, but luckily he’s one of the few people who ‘gets’ me.
Don’t get me wrong – I’ll miss him terribly and probably beg him to come back after 24 hours, but what a blissful 24 hours it’ll be.
Understand your partner and his or her need for a bit of free time. If you trust them, you won’t regret it.
