That mom sank to a new unadulterated sneaky low last weekend.
We were all sitting outside enjoying the sunshine. Then she disappeared for a while. I heard her voice floating down from the balcony.
Fudgie….. Fuuuuudges….
My ears pricked up. I leapt to my feet. Flew up the stairs and looked in the office first. Nothing. Went into the bedroom. Still nothing. The bathroom door was half closed – barged my way in and… she pounced on me.
Quick as a wink she whisked off my collar and whipped me into the bath.
I was most displeased to begin with, and then realised that actually the water was nice and warmish, but not too hot. Plus she was using a jug to wet me, instead of that nasty shower thing.
Quite frankly it was too hot to make a scene, so I sat my furry butt down and surrendered.
For once it was only me that got wet. Usually I try to leap out and mom has to anchor my head between her knees to keep me in the bath. This time I just sat quietly.
Don’t tell a soul but it was even half nice.
She hauled me out and towelled me off as best she could. But by now I was done with sitting still and being a good little doglet.
I charged down those stairs and into the garden.
Don’t you dare! She yelled at me.
But I did dare. I rolled in the dry grass – over and over. Then walked into the lounge and shook. Water droplets, hair and bits of grass flew through the air and littered her nice clean floor. Mom howled. Nooooooo!
I smirked. Bit stupid hey – to clean the floor the day before you bath me!
Looked at mom. So… is Ralphie going to have a bath too? He’s so dirty his black is brown.
Don’t be silly Fudges, mom replied. Cats don’t have baths. They clean themselves.
Yeah right! The only thing he cleans is between his toes in the middle of the night.
But the next day Mom was watering the pallet with all the pretty flowers and veggies in. She sloshed the water in from the top and the sides.
Two seconds later a very peed-off Ralphie stalked out from where he’d been snoozing behind the pallet.
So he ended up having a shower after all.
