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You know how some people rudely call me pudgy Fudgy?
Eeeuuuwww… or even worse, Fattie?
Well, it would appear that His Highness the cat is going to have to watch what he eats from now on too.
And if he doesn’t want to watch it – it will be watched for him.
Turns out Ralph’s first human (the one he had for seven years then abandoned – the miserable skanky old critter) is moving out of the complex. She came to chat to us about the situation the other day.
Mom, of course, said there was nothing to chat about.
Ralph was welcome to stay.
Ralph’s ex-human said she knew he preferred it here with us – but for selfish reasons – she was tempted to take him with her.
At this point Ralph made an entrance.
He stalked through the lounge on his way upstairs to drape himself across the bed.
He padded right past his ex-human without so much as twitching a whisker.
Even I felt that was a tad rude.
I offered her the chance to feel better by coming to play some ball with me.
She declined.
Maybe Ralph has a point.
Up to now she has always brought us Ralph’s food – the fancy stuff remember – but his food was starting to run out so Mom and Alpha forayed off to the mall to investigate a decent source of sustenance for his highness.
They came home with a big bag of Hills and a little cup to measure how much he should be allocated each day.
The lady in the shop and mom had a conversation.
It went like this…
Lady: You must feed him how much he should get.
Mom: Not how much he thinks he should get?
Lady: No! No! Weigh him and feed him the correct amount.
The next morning we were all lounging around on the bed, discussing how much Ralph weighed.
Alpha reckoned about two kilograms.
Mom was not sure.
She’s never weighed a cat before.
Alpha climbed on the scale and checked his weight.
Then he grabbed the cat and climbed back on the scale again.
He nearly toppled off with shock.
That cat weighed a whole seven kilograms.
They tried again – using mom this time.
He still weighed seven kilograms.
Ralph yawned and settled himself back on the bed.
I whispered in his ear…
Who’s a fat cat then?