Confessions of a single mamma

A RECORDING that went viral on social media and captured the miserable, abusive approach a man used to discipline his girlfriend’s six-year-old child, during a telephone conversation, prompted me to shine the spotlight on self-love.

This month, especially, when women will swoon over being on the receiving end of little or large tokens of ‘love’, I hope single moms remember that there is more to life than male attention and materialistic gains. I believe that in the world of single parenting, the safety and well-being of your child should always trump whatever tickles your fancy.

It is no secret that the road alone, with a child or children in tow, can be a lonely, depressing and somewhat overwhelming experience. With social media making it so easy to find the next best thing, the lonely journey can come to an end sooner than you expect when you receive that ‘Hi beautiful’ text from someone or bag yourself a catch who will ‘take care of you and your children.’

ALSO READ: Confessions of a single mamma

I have had moments where I felt I was drowning alone, as the support for a woman beaten to a pulp can be easier to find than if you have no scars to tell the tale of various forms of abuse.

Through it all, I had to remember that I had to love myself, and I found love in different forms. I am thankful to have grace, which comes from always choosing to do what is right, no matter how hard or easy the journey becomes.
I am also grateful to have amazing parents who have helped me cope with being a single mom, as well as two adorable sons who, without even knowing it, have pulled me out of my darkest places with their abundant love and laughter, so love can be found right at home, in different forms.

I found that puppy love works as Jewel, my fur baby, brought so much love and joy into our lives, which helped fill the gap in the family after I was divorced.

I would have been institutionalised if I didn’t have the love of an array of crazy friends, who have made my journey so much more bearable. Many of them have also helped me gain back parts of myself I thought I would not find again, and I found that love among friends goes a long way.

When self-love becomes a norm, women can easily use their intuition to sift out the bad nuts and contribute to snuffing out the rot of society, in turn eradicating the possibility of child abuse. . . So during the month of love, why not fall in love with you and experience other forms of love, and make it a ritual?

Share your experiences of self-love and how you cope during your journey as a single parent by emailing yoshinip@dbn.caxton.co.za.

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