Embracing yourself in an unkind world

We aren’t set up for success as a society when it comes to embracing yourself and self-compassion. In many ways, we are set up for failure. Social norms and societal expectations tell us who to be, how to act, and who not to be. We internalize those expectations and hold ourselves to a standard that is not only unrealistic but unattainable. We set ourselves up for failure, and then self-criticism and judgement follows.

How can you start moving from this forced negative cycle to authenticity? – Create a life that reflects who you are, flaws and all, and living that life authentically by embracing yourself.

Be kind to yourself

Recognize that the negative voice in your head is not you. Stop identifying with it and begin affirming the parts of you that you do like. Explore the qualities you want to attract and cultivate in your life. Begin your sentences with “I am worthy of” and “I deserve”. By the law of attraction, what you focus on expands – practice positive thinking and watch in delight as these thoughts unfold in your life.

Let go of what others think of you

You will never be able to please everyone. In fact, you should never aim to please anyone. People often bend to fit the moulds and roles others have set for us. Sometimes people act differently depending on who they are with at a given time. This betrayal of the self moves us away from our true identity and towards a faulty persona; leaving us questioning who we really are at the core. Let go of other people’s expectations and begin focusing on what you want, how you wish to be perceived, and what is going to make you happy.

READ: Coming to terms with grief and loss

Do things that scare you

The search for our authentic identity is a long and changing journey. As human beings, we are programmed to evolve. Who you are today is not who you were yesterday, or who you will be tomorrow. Change is scary. Embrace it. Every time we look fear in the face and challenge ourselves, we are expanding and learning valuable life lessons. The things that scare us the most are typically the things that we need to do the most; and the things that will provide us with the most amount of growth. Be open to change and do something that scares you every day.

 

Practising embracing yourself is the antidote. 

You are worthy of self-love, growing personally and living your life authentically, without apologizing for it. Being genuine and real in your life allows others to connect with you authentically and know you. We all have flaws, and we also all set high expectations and see things as flawed when they actually aren’t. Perspective helps weed this out. Everyone lives through times of feeling like a fraud, inauthentic, or disingenuous.