Five kilometres into an early morning run, this plodder was already shagged out so a chance encounter with a distressed ‘lady-of-the-night’ was not really what one’s aging (not raging) hormones could cope with.
Confession: This columnist picked up a young lady on the side of the main road near the Port Shepstone Country Club at about 5.30am last Saturday, took her home… and paid her (well, gave her money).
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For the benefit of my neighbours who saw me drive into our Umtentweni complex:
“I did not have sexual relations with that woman,” to quote Bill Clinton.
True story. On my way back home after running across the Mzimkhulu bridge, there was this young girl standing on the side of the road crying.
Whether she was a lady-of-ill-repute is anyone’s guess, but there were tell-tale signs like tight-fitting clothes, garish red lipstick, etc…
She was talking to a man in an old, red BMW coupe, a policeman who had just come off duty and was driving home. Unable to converse with me, she told him that she had been walking all night ‘from Durban side’ and was trying to get home to Bhobhoyi.
The policeman’s car was low on petrol, he had no money, so what to do?
We couldn’t just leave her, so I hopped into the back seat and we drove to my complex, up the driveway, me giving an embarrassed wave in passing to my neighbours who were sitting on their patio, drinking coffee and admiring the early morning birds tweeting.
Still all sweaty (from running), I rushed into the bedroom. grabbed my wallet, promised my dozing wife that I would explain later, dashed back out to the old BMW (which the whole complex could hear had a large hole in the exhaust) and handed R100 in small denominations to the lady through the window.
She looked a bit confused (maybe because there were no services rendered), but the policeman thanked me. I then ran alongside the car, waving sheepishly at my neighbours once again and let the two out of the gate.
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The policeman promised to drop her off at the Tweni shopping complex where she could catch a taxi home.
The story gained a few laughs at the golf club later, but was it really that funny?
In retrospect, it was actually quite tragic, a sad reflection of our unequal society.
However, thank goodness he wasn’t driving a marked police car.
Now that really would have looked suspicious!
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