KidsPrimary School
The importance of father-child bonding
If you're a dad who wants to develop a bond with your child but aren’t sure how to do so, you can try some of the following ideas...
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Bonding with your child is important but sometimes life can get busy and if you are juggling a career and parenthood, finding the time to connect with your child can be challenging.
A growing body of research has shown that when dads spend time with their children and begin developing a strong relationship with them from the very beginning, they reap a number of benefits. Fathers experience less stress and increased confidence when they have their own special time with their children. Strong father-child bonds can also help counter issues such as depression later on in life.
We chat with educational psychologist, Ilze van der Merwe-Alberts from the Bella Vida Centre in Johannesburg on how dads can nurture the bond with their child(ren).
How to bond with your baby
- Help your partner to bath Baby, or take turns. Most babies love water, and the two of you will have a splashing fun time. You can also bond with your little one by changing her nappy now and then and giving her a bottle.
- Read a simple book with colourful pictures and patterns to your baby.
- Play peek-a-boo with her. You can also play this game with a toy, which you can hide behind the couch or a wall and then make it reappear again. Look surprised when the toy reappears and add commentary like “I see you!” or “hello, baby”.
- Put on some music and dance with your baby – gently hold her and sway to the rhythm of the music.
- Play dress-up with her – put silly things like saucepans or a cushion on your head. This will bring out the giggles.
- Bounce your baby on your legs. Sit on a chair and let your baby sit on your knees and then bounce her up and down by rapidly raising your ankles and then lowering them.
- You can also let her sit on one ankle and bounce her by lifting your leg up and down.
- Play flying games with your baby. Sit on a chair and lay baby on your thighs, so that she’s looking down past your knees. Make sure you have a firm grip on her before moving your leg around in smooth, gliding movements.
- If your baby likes swimming, whoosh her up and out of the water and down again while holding her around her chest.
- Walk outside with your baby in her pram, point out things to see, and tell her about what’s going on.
- Lie next to her on the floor and use a torch to trace patterns on the ceiling and walls of the room.
How to bond with your toddler and older child
- Help your toddler get dressed in the morning and alternate days with your partner to drop her off at crèche or preschool.
- Eat breakfast with your children.
- Read a bedtime story to her every night and tuck her in.
- Spend some one-on-one time with your child – take her out for a picnic or to the zoo.
- Build towers with her using building blocks.
- Kick a ball outside in the garden.
- Allow your child to help you with chores such as sweeping or shaving – give her a little brush to help you sweep or let her put foam on your face before you shave.
- Play hide and seek with your children.
- Help them make cards for grandpa and grandma or mom.
- Have a treasure hunt in the garden – hide toys and leave notes all around the house to tell them where to find the treasure.
- Take your children to a fun playground where they can play on the jungle gym and run around freely.
- Take the kids swimming – there are lots of fun games that can be played in the water.
- Let your kids help you with the gardening – they’ll love digging in the ground alongside you.
- Take them on a camping trip for a weekend.
- Call your children from work and ask them how their day is going and if they’re having fun.