Letter to the editor: YOU cover insults those who have gone bald without choice

This is an opinionated piece – are YOU listening?

This letter is in response to the article Outrage over You Magazine’s ‘bald’ celebs published online on 21 October.

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Outrage over You Magazine’s ‘bald’ celebs

You and Lee-Ann respond to ‘bald’ celeb outrage

I usually reserve my opinions on social media because I think people don’t really care what I think, but this has been stewing for a few days and needs to be said. I apologise in advance if I sound passive aggressive.

A year or so ago a man in the UK created a campaign which said “I wish my child had cancer”.

I was horrified. I contacted him and explained to him that I found his campaign repugnant.

After I explained what repugnant meant, he responded saying his child had an extremely rare disease that gets very little support or awareness.

I felt sorry for him, he was just trying to create awareness through his campaign.

While I could only imagine his desperation at so badly wanting people to know what his child is going through, I battled to swallow the bitterness his campaign had left me with.

I know what its like to have a child die from cancer. First hand. Its ugly and sad and devastating.

So the question here is – did his outrageous campaign work? Yes it did.

People sat up and paid attention because it caused a stir. Was it right for him to cause a stir at the emotional expense of any other parent who has lost their child to cancer? No.

PR agents, digital media companies or campaign managers may soothe themselves by saying “well, we got what we wanted… they are paying attention now”’, but what they also get is a bucket load of disrespect and disappointment chucked in their direction too.

I would never, for the sake of creating awareness, knowingly cheapen or degrade someone else’s battle.

So, when the South African YOU magazine placed a well known SA model on the cover with her head supposedly shaved in support of breast cancer we all went “wow – great move”.

When the story broke that the shaved head was done in Photoshop there was an outrage.

I’ve seen children and adults with bald heads because the medicine killing the cancer (and parts of them) takes their hair in the process.

Its not a choice people make. So for someone to be able to choose to shave their heads in solidarity is an awesome thing – it makes those without choice feel a little less alone.

For a magazine to take a model who claims she’s “doing this for her dad” only to pose with her full head of hair and be made bald is a cheap trick. The model did lose her dad to cancer, that part was true, and I am truly sorry for her loss – but she would have been a better ambassador by wearing the sunflower fund bandanna or donating money to a breast cancer charity, or donating blood or registering as a bone marrow donor (let me just say that I’m sure she’s done at least one of these things – let’s give her the benefit of the doubt.)

The cancer patients who bought the magazine because they felt supported now feel cheated.

The editor justified their deception by saying “It was stated clearly in the editors letter and in the copy that it was digitally removed….Like it or hate it, this campaign has got people talking about cancer and it was always our objective.”

You and Lee-Ann respond to ‘bald’ celeb outrage

No. Your objective was to sell magazines. Putting a model on the cover with a fake bald head was a tactic. A means to a financial end.

It insulted those who have gone bald without choice and insulted those who shave their heads (for real) to show support for a loved one.

Outrage over You Magazine’s ‘bald’ celebs

This storm will blow over and the media will grasp onto something else, the fake shaved heads forgotten. I’d like to implore anyone who is trying to think of ways to create awareness of something important to them – do it.

Create awareness, but do it with class and style. Do it with clear intentions and one of those intentions should be to preserve the dignity of the people you are trying to help.

I work with Rainbows and Smiles and never once has the thought occurred to me to leverage sick and dying children as an “advert” for more funds.

We fight for kids with cancer. We do our best to preserve their dignity right until the end.

If we post photographs of them we do so with the parents permission and most times its a photo of these brave children smiling despite the cancer, despite the fear and despite the longing to be a normal kid.

So please, if you are involved in any form of campaigning always ask yourself three questions:

1) Will it create awareness?

2) Will it be at the emotional/physical expense of someone?

3) Íf you or a family member were the someone referred to in question 2, if you would I still go ahead?

If the answer is no then get back to the drawing board and come up with something else. Something better. Be better.

Details:  Rainbows and Smiles Durban

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