Educational psychologist says parents should be primary sex educators
PARKWOOD – Parents are encouraged to have open and honest discussions about sex with their children from a young age.
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In light of the recent publicity around gender-based violence in our country, Rosebank Killarney Gazette spoke to educational psychologist Claudia Abelheim at the Family Life Centre in Parkwood.
The centre conducts a number of sex education talks targeting learners and their parents at schools in the Joburg North area each year. The programme impacts around 2 500 children.
“Now, more than ever, kids have access to so much information without much control. They are exposed to inappropriate things. We need to inform them with the correct information and give them a space to talk and ask questions about confusing things,” said Abelheim.
“The more they know, the better empowered they are to make good choices.”
The talks discuss topics including puberty, healthy sexuality, relationships, consent, abuse and safe and unsafe touching.
Abelheim believes it’s important for parents to be primary sex educators. “Starting the discussion early means that you build a foundation for open and honest conversations later in life.”
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She said though it is impossible to prevent abuse through the actions of children, there are safety mechanisms that parents can put in place to protect their children. For example, parents can give children safe words to enable them to alert parents of any unsafe behaviour taking place outside of their sight. Abelheim said that parents should also teach children that their ‘no’ means no.
“You need to ensure that your children can come to you with anything.”
Particularly in the unsafe and violent country, we find ourselves in Abelheim said that boys and parents need to be educated.
“Parents need to model respectful behaviour to their children. Men need to call out friends who make sexist jokes. Moms need to talk to their boys about their personal accounts of harassment.”
She advised parents to not be bystanders, show kindness at home and encourage dialogue with their children.
“We can use what is going on in our country as an opportunity to create teachable moments for our kids,” she concluded.
Parents who would like to find out more about sex education can email Claudia on claudia@familylife.co.za
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Make use of the services on offer at the Family Life Centre in Parkwood