While some children can not wait for you to drop them off at school, there are others who try avoid going to school by faking sickness, crying and clinging to you, or protest getting out of their pyjamas.
It may just be a small step backward in your child’s natural progression toward independence, or it could be a sign of anxiety issues.
The following tips can help you deal with this situation.
1. Check for physical causes. If your child is complaining of physical symptoms, have her checked by a physician. It’s unlikely that anything is physically wrong with your child, but you don’t want to make that assumption and later find out you’re wrong.
2. Talk with your child. Talk about what’s bothering her, while at the same time making it clear that a plan will be made to return to school. Keep in mind, though, that some children can’t describe what is bothering them. Don’t force conversation if it doesn’t seem to be going anywhere. The most important message to convey is this: you believe your child can conquer this problem, and you’ll be there to help her through it.
3. Don’t lecture. Avoid lengthy discussions and debates about the importance of going to school. Lecturing won’t do any good, and it may actually make matters worse. Any attention, even negative attention, can reinforce and maintain a problem.
4. Play detective. Look for patterns when your child complains of illness. Does he wake up with a stomach ache or headache? Does he complain of these things when he’s busy and distracted? Does he feel ill on Saturdays? Be objective and play detective. Do this in a low-key, non-accusatory way; there’s no point in putting your child on the defensive. Look for clues as to what is causing your child to avoid school.
5. Set up a conference. Both parents should meet with the teacher and/ or the school counsellor. This sends the message to the school that you’re involved and committed to working on the problem.
6. Keep an open mind. Don’t assume the teacher or the school has done something wrong. Similarly, teachers should not assume the problem lies with the parents. When stress levels are high, it’s natural to want to point the finger and blame someone, but it doesn’t do much to solve the problem. It’s important to make sure that any reality-based fears, such as bullying, are addressed and corrected.
Source: https://www.psychologytoday.com.
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