Are you noticing strange behaviour from your children and are you worried that something could have happened to them?
Sometimes the warning signs are there but parents tend to ignore them because they do not know what they mean. For instance, is your child is being molested, or not?
The National Centre for Victims of Crime webpage states that one in five girls and one in 20 boys are victims of molestation. Yet it is far too under-reported by both children and adults. According to a 2003 National Institute of Justice report, three out of four adolescents who have been sexually assaulted were victimised by someone they knew well.
Children who have had an experience of rape or attempted rape in their adolescent years were 13,7 times more likely to experience rape or attempted rape in their first year of college.
A child who is the victim of prolonged sexual abuse usually develops low self-esteem, a feeling of worthlessness and an abnormal or distorted view of sex. The child may become withdrawn and mistrustful of adults, and can become suicidal.
According to the National Centre for Victims of Crime, children who do not live with both parents as well as children living in homes marked by parental discord, divorce, or domestic violence, have a higher risk of being sexually abused.
The Parent Protect foundation advises parents that children often show – rather than tell – that something is upsetting them. There may be many reasons for changes in their behaviour, but if you notice a combination of worrying signs it may be time to call for help or advice.
These are the warning signs you should look for if you think your child is being molested:
· Acting out in an inappropriate sexual way with toys or objects
· Nightmares, sleeping problems
· Becoming withdrawn or very clingy
· Becoming unusually secretive
· Sudden unexplained personality changes, mood swings and seeming insecure
· Regressing to younger behaviours, example bed-wetting
· Unaccountable fear of particular places or people
· Outbursts of anger
· Changes in eating habits
· New adult words for body parts and no obvious source
· Talk of a new, older friend and unexplained money or gifts
· Self-harm (cutting, burning or other harmful activities)
· Physical signs, such as unexplained soreness or bruises around the genitals or mouth, sexually transmitted diseases, pregnancy
· Running away
· Not wanting to be alone with a particular child or young person
Any one sign doesn’t mean that a child was or is being sexually abused, but the presence of several warning signs suggests that you should begin to ask questions and consider seeking help.
Keep in mind that some of these signs can emerge at other times of stress such as:
· During a divorce
· After the death of a family member or pet
· Problems at school or with friends
· Other anxiety-inducing or traumatic events
Physical warning signs:
Physical signs of sexual abuse are rare; however, if you see these signs, take your child to a doctor. Your doctor can help you understand what may be happening and test for sexually transmitted diseases. you may see
· Pain, discolouration, bleeding or discharge in the genitals, anus or mouth
· Persistent or recurring pain during urination and bowel movements
· Wetting and soiling accidents unrelated to toilet training
Childline Gauteng now operates from seven Community-Based Centres within the province (Inner City, Soweto, Diepsloot, Tembisa, Katlehong, Orange Farm and Sebokeng). Childline understands that genuine caring for those who have suffered is the key ingredient in the healing process, so their workforce of 48 torch-bearers devotes their attention to protecting the most vulnerable children in our society through a wide variety of services and programmes.
To speak to a counsellor regarding a case or for counselling, please call the National Crisis Line (toll-free) on 08000 55 555. Alternatively, call 011 645 2000, email admingauteng@childline.org.za or go online to https://www.childlinegauteng.co.za
Do you perhaps have more information pertaining to this story? Email us at roodepoortrecord@caxton.co.za (remember to include your contact details) or phone us on 011 955 1130.
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