It is absolutely normal to experience some anxiety and a few panic attacks as a parent about your child’s very first day at school.
In recent years, parents have gradually opened up about fears of their child growing up too quickly when the first day at crèche starts looming just days ahead. The reality has flipped from the kids crying for their parents to stay, to the other way around.
The great news is that you are not the only parent who feels that their little one is going into a cold dark world. Educational psychologist Leanda Otto adds that such feelings can be based on the parent’s previous experience with such an occasion.
“For some children it can be traumatic in the sense that its completely new for them, it’s physically a ‘big’ space with ‘big children’ whom they do not know. For the parents on the other hand, it can also be traumatic in the sense that they have to let their little babies (who are not that little any more) out into the ‘real’ world.”
Otto encourages parents to keep the following in mind to turn the experience into a positive one:
- Prepare yourself ahead of time by having your child meet and familiarise themselves with their teacher.
- Talk to your child about the first day. Find out what they are anxious about and speak to them about those anxieties.
- Say ‘Good-bye’ to your child. As tempting as it may be to sneak out, leaving without saying good-bye could risk your child’s trust in you.
- Teach your child independence. Give your child the confidence to be social and speak out when something upsets them.
- Get involved in school activities. This is one alternative that makes one feel much more involved and closer to their child’s education life. Join the school governing body, the school might eventually become a big part of your life.
- Routine and structure (as far as possible – without being an army officer) is very important from day one. Starting a morning routine and even a “special” ritual (like packing lunch together).
She concludes that one should “Try to keep emotions in tact as your child might feed off your emotions, so if mommy cries… Take lots and lots of pictures and cry on the way home.”
