Facing a Mother’s Day without a mom
Losing a mother, although at times a natural phenomena, can be devastating. BONUS spoke to a local, Elriza Kock, who lost her mother after a short illness to find out how Mother's Day is without a mother.
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POLOKWANE – “When we lost our mother, we were hurt. She was ill, so we expected it, but not that soon. She was the most loving and caring mother any child could ever ask for. She was there for all four of her children, in sickness and good health ensuring we had all we needed and almost all we wanted. It is not easy loosing a mother, nonetheless both parents, but life has to go on, hard as it may be,” explained Elriza from Westenburg.
Elriza says Mother’s Day reminds them of all she has done for them. “Mum kept us all together. On special occasions such as birthdays, Christmas, New Years and Easter weekends she made sure all her children are under one roof. We plan to keep this tradition going in her memory,” she added.
She says they visit her grave, which is in the same location as her father’s, clean it and just have a little chat with their parents as they believe although they are no more, their spirit is still with them and will forever be.
BONUS also spoke to registered counsellor, Maphuti Mashiane, to find out how families and friends can support those who lost their mothers during mother’s day. “Great emotional support helps a lot with regards to trauma from losing a loved one. No one ever really knows how they would take losing a parent, nonetheless a mother. I usually encourage clients who have lost their mothers to use Mother’s Day to remember all the good memories they had with their mothers, just to relive those moments. If they can visit their graveside, they should do so and also celebrate the day with other mother figures they currently have in their lives. Mothers aren’t only blood related; an aunt, mother-in-law or other mothers in the community can play motherly roles to anyone, given the opportunity,” he explained.
Mashiane says losing a loved one is not easy, but inevitable and life must go on after all.
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