Set free by finding the courage to leave
It took 33-year-old, Tsholofelo Radibape, numerous hospital stays and stitches before she found the courage to say enough is enough and leave her abusive relationship.
POLOKWANE – After suffering abuse at the hands of the man she thought loved her, Tsholofelo Radibape found the courage to leave him and she wants to share her experience so other women can be inspired to do the same.
Born in Gaseleka, Groblersdal, now living in Seshego, this 33-year-old mother says it has taken numerous hospital stays and stitches before she found the courage to say enough is enough and walk out of her abusive relationship.
“The same man whom I loved with my entire being and trusted with my life nearly ended mine. I can’t really explain how I managed to find enough courage to walk out of the relationship but I did. I strongly believe it was through God’s grace that I managed this feat. I prayed to God day and night to change him and to make him stop but it didn’t happen, instead I got the courage to walk away.
“I experienced physical abuse first-hand, being beaten to a pulp, hospitalised and bits and parts of my body broken and repaired for me to walk out of that relationship. I have been called names, shamed, beaten and sexually assaulted by my own partner whom I loved very much.
“Even though it is difficult to believe you can be sexually assaulted in a consensual relationship, it does happen but you can stop it, the power is in your hands,” she explains.
She says the first mistake she made was reaching for the TV remote instead of the cell phone for help with her circumstances as this made her suffer in silence for a long time while protecting her abuser.
She advises women who are going through any kind of abuse, be it emotional or physical, to walk out and walk away.
“It’s not worth it. Leave before you lose your life or the lives of your loved ones because you were hoping your abuser would change,” she emphasises.
“The problem is we can never really pin point what is going on in the mind of an abuser. One minute they are remorseful, apologetic, and promising to never lay their hand on you again but soon they forget these promises and go back to abusing you and making you feel inferior. I for one cannot understand why they do such horrible things to women because women give life and I cannot understand why someone would want to end what gives life.”
