A non-traditional approach to love
“We are openly gay and we do not hide it. If people do not like it, they can leave.”
POLOKWANE – Upon meeting them for the first time, you might think that Angela Smith* and Jessica Gibson* are just friends, but in truth, they are a couple and have been for the past three years.
“We are openly gay and we do not hide it. If people do not like it, they can leave,” says Angela.
The couple asked to keep their real names private out of respect for Angela’s daughter.
They met in 2014 after a mutual friend introduced them to each other. Jessica explains that seeing Angela with her daughter was an eye-opening experience and she knew then something more would come of their acquaintance. And she was right as after only a few months of dating, the couple moved in together.
“When we are together we try not to offend anyone by being in their faces, holding hands and showing affection. We respect others and their feelings. We do not want to make them uncomfortable,” says Angela.
According to Jessica, it is mostly men that give them funny looks. Angela says her daughter once asked questions about her father, who she has met before. After explaining why Angela and her daughter’s father are not together, her daughter accepted that her mother is homosexual.
“She is strong and a leader. She excels in everything she takes on. She is a girly girl. We wear makeup and do our hair. We are not butch. We each have a role to play in the house,” says Angela about her and Jessica’s relationship.
Jessica says they have lost a few friends over the years because of their sexual orientation. “Out of respect for my one friend, I’ve never told her that I am gay. Overall our being gay never was an issue. But people are not ignorant, they know,” she explains.
“Im not originally from Polokwane and I would say that it is a very gay-friendly city. There are a lot of people who have gay relationships but you have to think about those people in the community who do not accept it. You get those couples, straight or not, who will be in your face all the time, kissing, hugging and so on. We do not do that as we respect those that do not like it,” she continues.
She says them being gay has never stood in the way of either of them getting jobs and that their bosses do not mind their sexual orientation. On one occasion, Jessica explains, a client found out she is lesbian and reported it to Jessica’s superiors. Her superiors let the client know they are aware of this and that was the end of the story.
“I did hear people telling me to go to church and convert, but I know who I am,” Jessica concludes.
