Father’s Day from a singe dad’s perspective

POLOKWANE – Single parenting is a vastly different experience from nuclear family parenting and it also brings both challenges and rewards.

The Polokwane Review-Observer spoke to Thabiso Molepo, a chef at a local restaurant ahead of Father’s Day about the ins and outs of being a single father to his 10-month-old son and what it takes to beat the stigma.

“It takes a lot of sacrifice to be a single father. The fact that we do not have time for ourselves and that we have to put our personal goals on hold for the sake of our children. Sometimes loneliness surrounds me in the house and adjusting issues with my former partner sometimes makes me feel like giving up on life. However, I always tell myself that giving up is definitely not an option. I have to be strong for my son,” he said.

Thabiso’s daily routine includes preparing bottles for his son, changing nappies and making sure he eats healthy, nutritious meals.

“Most people have a negative mindset on single fathers because they think we’re incapable of taking care of our own children, but if you’re disciplined and grew up around women that have taken good care of you, you will know how to do it eventually. Also even if you didn’t have a good upbringing or bad background, you can still work hard and give your child a better life or future than the one you had,” he said.

“Taking care of a child as a single father is not easy, however, we must try our best to do what we best can because those little beautiful beings depend on us, even when they grow older. We need to be and set good examples to younger fathers by letting them know that anything is possible. It doesn’t always have to be women or mothers that need to take care of our children, but let’s also step in and try to assist where we can. Let’s be good role models to the next generation.”

Thabiso added that his child goes to daycare daily and he wakes up early in the morning like any other parent and prepares his son for the day. He picks his son up after work to get home and cook a healthy dinner for the both of them.

“Remember, being a single father includes cooking, laundry and other household chores as well, it’s not just all finance and taking care of the child, so always be prepared for all of those challenges,” he said.

Thabiso said it’s possible for young fathers to take care of their children without the mom being present at all times.

“It’s a rewarding job at the end of the day because fathers like us prove to a lot of judgmental and negative people out there that a dad can raise a child alone and do a great job at that. I love my son and he will grow up knowing that I did my best to give him a better future than the one I had,” he said.

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