A 32-year-old Plastic View woman this week shared her story with Rekord of drug use, prostitution as well as physical and emotional abuse before she found religion.
Thandeka Ndlovu fell into prostitution when she and her child were left in poverty.
She was taken to the Plastic View informal settlement, east of Pretoria by a friend, who showed her the ins and outs of the night life.
On the first three days on the job, Thandeka made close to R3 000, which allowed her to buy food and clothes for her daughter and pay rent.
She could also put money aside to pay a woman who looked after her daughter whom she left behind in Johannesburg.
“I got into it, but it wasn’t easy,” she said.
“I watched my soul die every single day.”
She saw her daughter four times a week, when she returned home from work in Pretoria. The life was taking a toll on her emotionally and psychologically.
Her ordeal started in 2016, when she lived in Johannesburg where she worked as a waitress at a local restaurant.
Thandeka fell in love with a man in the area.
“I was head over hills in love him, but everything changed after I got pregnant.
“He made me leave my job and insisted that he would be able to take care of everything in the house,” she said.
“But I started seeing signs that he was not as committed to me as he had claimed to be.
“He sometimes would not sleep at home and we would have nothing to eat. He was not keeping his promise”
As time passed, the situation grew desperate for Thandeka as her partner left for Belgium, leaving her and their new-born daughter behind.
As months went by, Thandeka grappled with trying to keep the lights on and feeding her child.
“We had absolutely nothing. I had to mix powdered milk with porridge, make it a thin consistency in order to feed my child. Rent needed to be paid and I also had to eat,” she said.
“Things had become really bad and I felt so hopeless.
“This is when I was introduced to prostitution and drugs. I felt like I had no other option” she said.
“I had to use drugs and alcohol to cope. I used cocaine, pills and stone. Even then, my body was not coping. Sometimes I would be assaulted and sworn at.
“My [new] partner offered to take care of my child’s need while I looked for a job. I did not hesitate. I took the offer.”
Thandeka left the nightlife and started working at a restaurant in Pretoria.
Months later, her child fell ill while with a caregiver and died leaving her scared and lonely.
“Overcoming these challenges was not easy. All parts of society rejected me. My family, friends and members of the community,” she said.
“In 2019, I started attending skills development classes at the NG Moreleta Park church after the job at the restaurant ended. This is where I completely changed my life around. I got counselling, bible studies and the necessary motivation every day.”
The programme is aimed at helping empower women at the informal settlement with sewing, caregiving and cooking skills so as to be self-reliant.
Thandeka committed to the programme, and quit drugs and alcohol.
“I don’t touch those things anymore. I am looking for employment now and I have no doubt I will do great. I have changed friends.
“My journey was not easy. There was a point where I felt like I could not cope anymore and I wanted to end it all.
“I stood at the edge of a building and I wanted to toss myself over. I tried to jump off a building, I am crying, my daughter cries too. In the midst of all this I am praying,” she said.
“It was such a confusing time for me. But now I am stronger and better”
She has since gone on to have another child who is eight-months-old with his partner.
She encouraged women who might be in the same situation to seek help when they were ready to change.
“I have two certificates from the programme; one for parenting and guidance, one for domestic work. I am still doing my sewing course, I am fluent in three languages, namely Shona, English and isiZulu. I still have a chance at life,” she said.
“I am unshaken now; people may judge me, but I live in faith.”
Informal settlement healthcare expert Dr Ellenore Meyer of the University of Pretoria said informal settlements posed health risks, particularly to vulnerable populations such as women and children, the elderly, and were likely to aggravate gender-related inequalities.
Meyer spearheads the university’s informal settlement health care project, where they bring free quality primary health care services to various informal settlements
“Working with vulnerable women and children where they live, we get to see first-hand what they experience and what they have to overcome. This enables our community orientated primary care team to have a better understanding on how to support patients. The team also develops empathy and compassion for what difficulties people often face to have a better life or afford opportunities to their children.
“Thandeka’s story highlights the importance of inter-disciplinary work and collaborating with NGOs and churches at grassroots level where people live and work,” Meyer said..
“Holistic healthcare should expand beyond free primary care services to support nutrition and how to grow vegetables and keep chickens within informal settlements. It must enable skills development that empower women to earn an income and make decisions about their bodies, health and lifestyle.
“Thandeka’s story is a story of an overcomer. A woman who should be celebrated and inspire others that they can do the same.”
Over the next few weeks, Rekord will release a series of articles celebrating individual women living in informal settlements. At the end all of them will be celebrated collectively on a special day/function bringing them all together.
If anyone wants to become involved as a volunteer or donate towards one of the skills development initiatives, they can contact the COPC research unit at the University of Pretoria by sending an email at ellenore.meyer@up.ac.za.
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