Dear Herald readers.
Different parenting styles have been studied since 1967 by social scientists who have determined that the manner in which parents interact with their children can predict the children’s future competence in various areas of their lives.
In other words, an individual’s parenting style can be used to predict the likely psychosocial adjustment of their children that includes their academic performance, self-esteem and relationships with other people.
An authoritarian parenting style is the third identified style of parenting.
These types of parents attempt to control the behaviour and attitudes of their children.
They have absolute standards and very high expectations of their children. They expect obedience without exception and punish any deviation from rules.
In theory, raising children according to strict rules and trying to control their behaviour does not sound wrong. Research, however, revealed that this style of parenting does not ensure the best outcome for children in comparison to an authoritative parenting style.
According to studies conducted over three decades, authoritative parents enforce high standards for their children but are highly supportive of them and respect their uniqueness. These parents do not confuse their children’s own interest and opinions with disobedience and disrespect.
In comparison to an authoritarian parenting style, authoritative parents provide their children with structure, guidance, clear behavioural expectations and consistent discipline.
These are considered to be the necessary elements to teach children to be successful in their personal relationships. These children are also found to be best adjusted in comparison to their peers who are raised by authoritarian or permissive parents.
Permissive parents who avoid disciplining their children, ignoring misbehaviour and setting limits on their children’s behaviour might believe that their children should be more independent from an early age.
However, expecting children to manage situations that they are not yet developmentally ready for, could potentially put them in dangerous situations and compromise their personal growth and future performance.
Being a parent is without a doubt a challenging task but in respect of your child’s future success and happiness, an extremely important one.
Feeling overwhelmed by an unruly three-year-old or an extremely angry 14-year-old does not make us bad parents.
It is, however, important that we as parents become aware of our parenting styles and to adjust it if necessary in order to benefit our children and offer them the best opportunity to become well-functioning adults.
Please share your experiences and views on parenting by sending an email to SandriAppelgryn@gmail.com.
