How to visit a loved one with Alzheimer’s
If you’re visiting someone with Alzheimer’s or dementia, use these tips to guide you so that you both have a positive experience.
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First things first
- Plan your visits strategically
- Limit visitors to one or two people at a time. Too many people can be overwhelming.
- Schedule visits for the time of day when your older adult is usually at their best.
- Minimise distractions by keeping the environment calm and quiet. Turn off the TV or loud music and ask any non-visitors to go to another room.
- Send this list to your visitors ahead of time so they’ll have time to absorb the information.
Do
- Keep your tone and body language friendly and positive.
- Don’t speak too loudly.
- Make eye contact and stay at their eye level.
- Introduce yourself even if you’re convinced they know you. “Hi Grandma, I’m Joe, your grandson.”
- Speak slowly and in short sentences with only one idea per sentence. For example: “What a beautiful day. The sunshine is nice, isn’t it?”
- Let them take their time; don’t rush the conversation.
- Use open-ended questions with no right or wrong answers.
- Sit together in silence; they may enjoy that just as much as talking.
- Allow them to express sadness, fear, or anger.
- Go with the flow of the conversation even if they talk about things that aren’t true or don’t make sense; you need to enter their reality.
- Share and discuss memories of the past as they’re more likely to remember things from long ago.
- Come prepared with an activity, like something to read out loud, a photo album to look at, or some music to listen to.
- Covid allowing, give gentle touches and hugs.
Don’t
- Say “do you remember?”
- If they say something that’s not correct, just let it go and don’t argue.
- Don’t point out mistakes; it just makes them feel bad and doesn’t help the conversation.
- Many people have moments of clarity so don’t assume they remember anything.
- If something means or nasty is said, try not to take it personally; the disease can twist their words or make them react badly out of confusion, frustration, fear, or anger.
- Talk down to them; they aren’t children and you should show the proper respect.
- Don’t talk about them with others as if they’re not there.
* Source: dailycaring.com