Being in love is a decision that one has to make everyday
I’ve been considering the nature of relationships recently. There has been a fair bit going on lately that’s gotten me thinking, such as Caster Semenya paying Violet Raseboya’s family lobola. Also a very strange story about some American who wanted to marry his dog – admittedly, a very attractive blonde retriever, who’s always happy to see …
![](https://images.caxton.co.za/wp-content/uploads/sites/63/2014/08/Kelly-Parting-shot1.jpg)
I’ve been considering the nature of relationships recently. There has been a fair bit going on lately that’s gotten me thinking, such as Caster Semenya paying Violet Raseboya’s family lobola.
Also a very strange story about some American who wanted to marry his dog – admittedly, a very attractive blonde retriever, who’s always happy to see him when he walks in the room and obeys his every command…
I had to have a private laugh, as I can think of a few spouses who would be better off with their loyal pets as partners than the dodgy human ones they’ve stuck themselves with.
During the wild ramblings of my thoughts it struck me that the so-called ‘categories’ of relationships are not exhaustive. There are some relationships that do not fall into ‘standard’ definitions. We normally have boyfriends and girlfriends, and husbands and wives. We have business partners and colleagues and bosses and staff (who seem to overlap with spouses oftentimes…). We have children and assorted family members. And we have friends. But what about unconventional relationships, like two people who remain married but each has their own ‘girlfriend’ or ‘boyfriend’, on the side, in the open? Or people who end up living together with their ex-spouse and his/her new partner? Or people who have three-person relationships, living together as a ‘trouple’ (how apt, that word…)? Or people who are married but live apart, with their parents? There are people who have had children, gotten married and then divorced, then back together and had more children, but never remarried. (Maybe they subscribe to the idea that the secret to a good marriage will forever remain that way…)
But anyway, all these things are fine, aren’t they, so long as no one’s being hurt and there’s some love going around?
Or am I seriously wrong about that? Because society is somewhat limited in what is considered ‘decent’ or ‘acceptable’ in terms of ‘love unions’. I believe that love is good, no matter who’s giving it or who’s getting it.Gay marriage, for example, is just the legalisation of a different kind of love. It’s a step forward in the right direction – allowing people to formalise a relationship that is just as worthy to them as anyone else’s ‘normal’, heterosexual marriage, and teaching the world in general to let people love more.
I remember what a family member said at his wedding: “Being in love is a decision that one has to make every day – to decide to love someone, every morning, forever.” I used to be indecisive but now I’m not so sure… So I’ll focus on the relationship that I have with my bed: no commitment needed – we’ll just sleep together every night.
love it a lot to think about there. the writer really got me to rethink what i have always have been told it “normal”