Newcastle SAPS addresses bullying:
Bullying, according to Lizzy Arumugam of the Newcastle SAPS Corporate Communications office, is repeated aggressive behaviour that can be physical or verbal.
“You are made to feel hurt, angry, afraid, helpless, hopeless, isolated, ashamed, and even guilty for the bullying. You may even consider suicide.”
According to Arumugam, it often happens that a victim’s physical health is likely to suffer, and they are more likely to develop mental health issues like depression, anxiety, or low self-esteem.
Bullying can take many forms, including hitting, kicking, or pushing someone, or even threatening to do so, stealing, hiding, or ruining someone’s belongings, hazing, harassing, or humiliating someone, or forcing someone to do something he or she does not want to do.
Verbal bullying includes the following:
Name-calling, teasing, taunting, refusing to speak to someone, excluding someone from groups or activities and spreading lies or rumours about someone.
Arumugam also stated that anyone being bullied should always remember the following:
- Don’t hold it against yourself!
“This isn’t your fault. You should not be ashamed of who you are or what you feel, regardless of what others say or do.”
- Take pride in who you are.
“Despite what a bully says, you have many wonderful qualities. Keep those in mind instead of what bullies tell you.”
- Look for help.
“Speak with a parent, teacher, counsellor, or another responsible adult. Seeing a therapist does not imply that something is wrong with you.”
Tips for dealing with a bully and overcoming bullying
Arumugam explained that in order to defeat a bully, you must retain your self-control and self-esteem.
- Walk away from the bully.
“Bullies want to know that they have control over your emotions, so do not react with anger or retaliate with physical force. If you walk away, ignore them or calmly and assertively tell them that you are not interested in what they have to say. In this way, you are demonstrating that they do not have control over you.”
- Report the bullying to a trusted adult.
“If you do not report threats and assaults, a bully will often become more and more aggressive. In many cases, adults can find ways to help with the problem without letting the bully know that it was you who reported them.”
- Repeat as necessary.
“In the same way as the bully, you may have to be relentless. Report each and every bullying incident until it stops.”
- Find support from those who do not bully.
“Having trusted people you can turn to for encouragement and support will boost your resilience when being bullied. Reach out to connect with family and real friends. There are plenty of people who will love and appreciate you for who you are.”
How to tell if your child is being bullied
Arumugam claims it is possible that a parent or teacher will not always notice if their child is being bullied.
“Most bullying occurred when children were alone at school or on their way home from school, away from adults.”
She claimed that bullies were skilled at concealing their behaviour from adults, and that victims frequently covered up evidence out of shame of being victimised.
The following warning signs may indicate that your child is being bullied:
- Your child appears worried, angry, and depressed.
- Your child’s nightmares may become more frequent.
- Physical complaints become more frequent, and your child avoids discussing physical injuries.
- Withdrawal from friends and activities they previously enjoyed.
How to prevent bullying:
- Discuss bullying with your children.
“Simply discussing the issue can be a huge stress reliever for someone who is being bullied. Be encouraging and listen to a child’s feelings without passing judgment, criticism, or blame.”
- Seek assistance for a child who is afraid of a bully.
“Ascertain that other teachers, friends, and counsellors are aware of the child’s bullying. No child should have to face bullying on their own. And lastly, notify the appropriate authorities about these incidents in order for it to be dealt with accordingly,” Arumugam concluded.
