You can # until you are blue in the face but will it rain?

Now that we know that there will be no increase in university fees next year (otherwise Jacob will have to find a new Union Building – the present one he operates from nearly burnt down – even the protests of the 1980s of the old days did not get that close to forcing a coup), a new campaign has been launched dubbed, #thepriceofeverythingmustfallotherwisewearegonnabanhashtags.

The petrol price is already playing ball having gone down 22 cents a litre at midnight.
Toddlers, we hear, are banding together in an effort they call #crechefeesmustfallorwegettokeepourdirtynappieson.

Motorists in Dundee want the #parkingfeesmustfall campaign. Said their activist, Axe Meter: “I mean, who keeps 20 cents these days? Even the street guys demand R5 and up. We don’t want no parking meters.”

Drinkers are also agitating. #keepliquorpricesdownorwestaydrunk is gathering momentum. Their logo is ‘bigger glasses, lower prices’.
Ratepayers, as always, want lower local government taxes.

#wewantnocrackedpavements is their slogan and they are against the selling of posts in the Kremlin too.
Which is a good thing – otherwise you may end up with someone who can’t use a cellphone checking your meter.

There are also the anti litter campaigners, who like panelbeaters, will be never be out of their jobs in this town.
#usetherubbishbinsandstopleavingyourkfcboxesincoronationpark is lead by the Desert Rat who patrols that part of town but up until now, has not won a battle but plans to win the war.

The funny part is that prices do not go down – not in the real world. The only thing that does come down is the time it takes for your salary to run out in the month.
Previously we could say only the rain comes down but even that is also not true anymore.

Even oom Herman de Wet will have to revise his stock greeting of ‘no fresh complaints thanks’. No, we have plenty to complain about, given the chance.
There is also the anti-abortion poster group who call themselves #cantyoustopstickingyourpostersontheoldagehomewall. This group also wants to ban glue, which, of course, has several people up in arms on Beaconsfield Street.

And then lastly there is a mysterious group who feels that these hashtag things are just too long and tedious.
They want shorter hashtags – they call themselves #no.