Growing older can bring joy for some, but pain and discomfort for many others. As physical abilities decline and roles and responsibilities change, mental health often dips.
This is, says Fairland-based life coach Lara Bonetto, “A leading cause of severe depression in the elderly, which can lead to a more serious mental health crisis.”
Financial difficulties and feelings of isolation are the most common causes of a decline in mental health and happiness.
“The over 60s face many changes such as losing partners, careers ending which brings a loss of income and identity with many also experiencing a decline in health.”
One of the most distressing things for older people to experience, Bonetto says, is when decisions are made about their futures without them. “The feeling of being a helpless chess piece that is moved to new accommodation or into a new situation by their children or other kin is very traumatic.”
She describes several clients who have survived a suicide attempt and hopes to help others who are feeling vulnerable and who see no way out of their current negative situation.
“Help is available, but people do not reach out and ask for help often enough. They do not want to become a burden, nor face the reality that their ‘golden years’ are not what they had planned for or expected.
“The elderly often come from a position of not wanting to complain too much because of fear they are seen as ungrateful. This post-war generation might especially find it hard to ask for help or admit to feeling vulnerable. Men often perceive admitting to depression as a sign of being weak, which of course it is not.”
Reasons the elderly may feel depressed
- Loss of income
- Inability to work or unable to find work
- Retirement and loss of identity
- Loss of a spouse or partner
- Friends and family pass away
- Fear of own mortality
- Loneliness and feelings of isolation
- Adult children emigrate or move away
- Loss of independence
- Declining health or pain
- Loss of hearing or eyesight
- Worry about the future
- Inability to cope well with load-shedding and other municipal ills
- Lack of touch and affection.
Bonetto urges the elderly to reach out and cut the stigma around admitting they are struggling or need help. “It is often only when one asks for help that others realise all is not well. Many people believe everything is okay because they have not been told otherwise.
Contact Lara Bonetto via her website at www.1lifecoach.co.za
Related article:
