Raped multiple times, survivor Leyonie Marais wrote to the president asking for help to curb sexual assault

Leyonie Marais was raped six times by six different men.

She said forgiving the perpetrators enabled her to go on to live a happy and fulfilled life as not doing so would have kept her imprisoned by them.

“My rapists no longer own me because I set them and myself free to survive.”

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She recently published her book, De throne the rapist which is an awe-inspiring memoir that she hoped would help other survivors of sexual assault.

At the back of the book is a letter she sent to President Cyril Ramaphosa in 2019.

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Here is an excerpt from that letter…

My story starts as a five-year-old witnessing endless domestic violence in our household. At the age of 13, I was sexually abused by a family member. At age 14, I was sexually molested by a school caretaker.

At 15, I was raped by a family member at our family home in my room on my bed. At 16, I was molested by a stranger in a taxi at gunpoint. Later that year, I was molested again by another stranger on a train.

At this point, I despised men and myself too. I hated the mere sight of myself; I could not bear looking at myself. At 21, I was raped by a man I called my boyfriend.

Things started spiralling out of control for me in every dimension of my life. I am now married to a loving man, and I have respectful children.

I need your help please Mr President in setting other children, women and men free from hating themselves as a result of abuse.

Below are some recommendations she put forward to the president regarding how victims of sexual assaults could be better assisted:

• Police Stations: Confidentiality for victims. For SAPS to apply professional, calm and ethical behaviour, to help and assist in facilitating the process for the victim, rather than interrogating them and making the victim(s) feel like they are lying or that they are to be blamed for what happened to them. A complete behavioural change at SAPS is desired
• Rewrite the Child Protection and Sexual Offenders Bill. The devastating impact this selfish act has on any victim is enormous. The trauma and fear of having to see your perpetrator released from prison after six months or not even imprisoned at all because the rapist knows a police officer who made his docket disappear. Stronger measures and penalties must be put in place for these offenders to know and realise that as a country, we do not condone this behaviour.
• The use of ITC (information technology and communication systems) will enhance the efficiency of this process – that reports and dockets are systemised and will not disappear from the grid.

• Send a resounding message that Enough is Enough. Not in your name will mothers, grandmothers, daughters, sisters and sons be violated in this beautiful country.
• Rehabilitation: Set up quality centres in all nine provinces of our beautiful country. Empower the lives of these victims through a 90-day programme to realign their mindset – to enable them to understand that what had happened to them had nothing to do with them or what they wore. Give them their dignity back and restore their worth.
• Educate Our Boys: Rehabilitate the men of our country by teaching them how women should be treated through a mentorship programme. Let us raise strong boys who will become whole men who will build a strong nation.

You can contact Marais at www.leyonemarais.co.za.

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